


Waiting for the Curtain to Fall

by Lazchan



Category: Servamp (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Gen, Pre-Story, Speculation
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-09-27
Updated: 2016-10-25
Packaged: 2018-08-17 14:27:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 25,752
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8147426
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lazchan/pseuds/Lazchan
Summary: A look into how 'father' may have gathered Lawless into the family of Servamps; a bit of a speculation pre-story fic.





	1. Chapter 1

Sleepy Ash was grateful for the overcast day; he really didn't feel like hiding in his cat form this time; his father would keep him closer in those instances, a small cat that could perch on his shoulders. They had traveled far this time, far from home and familiar sites, in search of more family.

 

_Don't we have enough already?_ He thought, but he knew his father too well. After he had been changed; after they had found the small child, he thought that was enough—but they had found another young man that was so traumatized by the changes that he always hid; the young woman that saw the fractured bits of the family and drew them all together.

 

Every time his father wanted to find someone else, they would travel to a new country. Sleepy Ash yawned and wondered when it was all going to end, when his father would get tired of it all and stop his experiments.

 

He stayed in the spot that his father had ordered him to go to and he watched the young man in front of him. Undersized, skinny and wearing patches of cloth that barely resembled clothing. Why he had to make a choice on such a thing—but he was the oldest and the first of the experiments that his father made. _I will still take who I wish, Sleepy Ash… but you'll be his older brother and I want you happy as well with my choice._

He had watched this one before; in his cat form and had been surprised when the boy who had nothing fed him scraps of food. He seemed like he was a good kid and Sleepy Ash sighed as he watched the boy make dramatic moves across the small space, bringing in bits of coins and food as he gave a dramatic telling of a story.

 

He deserved better than to become an immortal monster.

 

~

 

It had been a good day; there were enough scraps to eat and enough bits of coins to get some more to eat and he watched the crowd around him cautiously, tucking everything close by for him. He liked watching people and he wondered who he could follow behind this time. He liked to pretend that he was a part of their family, their friends—

 

Out of the corner of his eye, he spotted the strange looking kid again—the one that was with the close-looking family; with the small kid and the older sister looking girl and the father that doted after all of them, hands possessive on their shoulders. He pretended the most that he was a part of that family; the pale-haired kid seemed like what he imagined a big brother would be like. Each look was fiercely protective, but sad all at the same time, as if he knew that he could only do so much in this world.

 

The kid looked up at the sky for a moment and sighed, running a hand through his hair, before moving forward quietly. In his hands he held one of the wrapped pastries they sold two rows over. "… for your show," he muttered. "It was good."

 

He stared up at him, at the way the tips of the his ears went red, of his quiet voice and the way he immediately shoved his hands away as soon as the pasty was handed over. Turning over the pastry in his hands, he struggled not to shove it all in his mouth at once.

 

The boy hesitated, open his mouth and then muttered something too low for him to hear, before moving off. Not even at a fast pace or with an intention to lose him; but with the absolute exact speed one needed to get to where you needed to go.

 

It wouldn't hurt to follow him. If he could afford pastries that were fresh and hot, then maybe he had more. He just wanted to pretend for a bit longer. He gathered all his items and stood quickly, following behind the other as casual as he could, eating bits and pieces of the pastry while he walked.

 

He was led about to the small area that housed a few hostels and hotels; not that he should have been surprised, really—none of the family that he saw looked to be around from here, but he wondered just what had drawn them to this town.

 

"Sleepy Ash—you're late," he jumped at the voice that came out of the shadows; he didn't see who was speaking. "Have you done what Father asked?"

 

The boy—Sleepy Ash? What sort of strange name was that? He stayed far enough away, still eating and listening attentively. "Yes," he muttered. "Father will be happy." He stepped further into the shadows that ringed the hotel. "One more monster."

 

"You know that's not the case…" the voice scolded and then both of them faded away and he wondered just what that meant. He looked down at the pastry and swallowed hard, wondering what such a gift really meant.

 

_Ah, you're not acting here or anything. This is real life and all and people don't just give out food like that for some sinister purpose…_

 

He was being overly dramatic, overthinking what it could all mean. He was, however, intrigued by what it could have meant and what it could mean for him. He looked up at the hotel again. "Strangers, huh?" he asked out loud, musing to himself. Strangers didn't know the town as well as he did and they were always willing to pay for help.

 

He would simply wait until one of them came by again and he'd make his move.

 

~

 

This time it was the older sister—the one that seemed most at ease, but scowled at everything around her. On her shoulders rode a small black cat—he squinted at it. Was it the same black cat that he had fed before? _It's fate, destiny—_ he laughed to himself. _That a small black cat that crosses my path can bring me closer to my goal…._

 

She watched his performance—this time, someone had noticed him enough to get him a bigger space and a small platform that he could move around on. The coins helped him to get something else to wear and he tugged on the ends of his scarf, flicking them back in what he hoped was a suitably dramatic fashion.

 

Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed her talking to the cat, pointing out something here and there, directing her gaze back to him. He flinched a little, but she didn't seem angry at him or what he was doing, but still; he put forth more effort to try and impress her and the audience as a whole. The more money he had, the  more presentable he could be….

 

He didn't know why he had latched onto the idea of that family in particular; something about the group drew him in and he couldn't get the thought out of his head. It was after the performance that he went straight up to the woman, staring up at her as she scowled down at him. "Where's your brother? He's usually the one watching." He was actually a little disappointed at that.

 

She smirked and looked down at the cat again, using a fingertip to run down the dark fur. "He's around," she said, head tilted to the side. "You've gotten better," she observed. "Your little performance places aren't too far from where we are staying." She rested a hand on his shoulder, frowning a little at the thinness of his clothes and body. "… you're good enough you should have more meals. When did you last eat?" she demanded.

 

He blinked back at the scolding tone; he had heard it here and there in the tones of mothers. Berating their children for the smallest infraction, but with a tone of 'I'm worried' underneath. He gave her a lopsided grin. "I eat…" he said slowly, rocking back on his heels and watching her. "When someone gives me food or I can find something." He shrugged. "It's not like I'm rich like you guys to stay in a hotel…"

 

Her eyes narrowed and he got a twin stare from the cat and girl, which was frankly just unnerving. He backed up another step. "See if I feed you scraps anytime soon, kitty," he muttered. "You look like you're about to lecture me, too."

 

The girl snorted. "How'd you know where we were?" she demanded. "Did you follow us or something?" Her expression softened. "It's dangerous to do something like that, you know."

 

He swallowed a little and rubbed the back of his head. "I… I mean, you guys aren't from around here or anything, it's kinda obvious—" he rolled his eyes. "So if you don't live here, ya gotta be staying in a hotel or something, right?" he gave an uneasy laugh, but pushed forward. "I'm trained for the stage and I know how to see my audience!" He gave a dramatic flourish.

 

She barked out a laugh at that. "I can see why Sleepy Ash is amused by you," she patted his head and then without warning, grabbed his arm and began dragging him off. "Come on, we're going to get you fed. You know this place, huh?" she asked, poking him in the chest. "Then you're going to explain it to us."

 

He blinked, a little thrown off that his plans were already circumvented and taken over by this woman that had a take-no-prisoners expression on her face. He began to grin even wider. It was more fun this way.

 

~

 

"So you were spying on us," the boy was back again, sitting across from him. The cat had already wandered off, but he couldn't but notice the same sort of stare between cat and boy. _Well, some people look like their pets, I guess…_ "Why?" he asked. His tone still had that odd flat, tired quality as before and he spoke from a slumped position on the table.  

 

"… you seemed interesting," he muttered, kicking at the table and trying not to stare at the food that was being brought to them.  "Figured if you were still around here, I could… teach you about the town or something. Get used to it and all…"

 

The woman snorted and pushed the food in front of him. "Eat." She smacked her brother on the back of the head. "Sit up, Sleepy Ash—he's going to think you're the laziest brother." There was a hint of smirk on her face, an inside joke that he didn't get.

 

"And you're just the nagging mother," Sleepy Ash deadpanned, but he sat up, yawning as he did so. "Our… father…will probably enjoy the help." The words were dragged out of him, each one painful and deliberate. "You should stop by with us."

 

"I think it's a good idea," she said firmly. "He needs something more." She pushed the beer towards him. "Don't you think so?" she asked. She gave him a once over. "Certainly more food and you know that we have enough—" She glared at him, as if daring him to disagree.

 

"I'm not just going to _take_ it," he muttered, glaring at the two of them, even as he was curling the food close to him, taking a quick bite and then going for another. "I can do stuff… help out and… stuff." He kicked at the bench again and gave them a wistful look. They were so casual and affectionate and again he wondered if this was what families were actually like.

 

"What a rousing endorsement," the woman muttered, but there was a smile on her face. "Finish eating. We'll take you by our house and see what you can offer if you're actually thinking about it. Do your … stage thing and pretend that you at least are confident in your abilities."

 

He pouted at how she phrased it. "I thought you said I was good," he pointed out, but it didn't stop him from finishing off what food he was given and practically bouncing on his toes, eager to get moving again. Having a good meal was one thing, but sitting still was quite another and he was already eager to get moving.

 

"I said you improved," she grinned at him and he was surprised at the way her expression changed with the look, before it was back to being serious once more. With one hand, she picked up her brother and set him on his feet. "Let's get moving."

 

He looked between the two of them as they walked down the street to where he had followed them before, and he wanted to ask questions, he wanted to know  more—he wanted to know why they were being so accepting and the part of him that had been surviving on his own for so long was trying to get his attention.

 

_Trap? Is it one or is it real? They don't seem bad at all… you've watched them long enough to see that—_

 

"Sleepy Ash…" He hadn't realized he spoke out loud until the boy turned to look at him. "Is that a nickname or…?" It had to be a nickname; it was such an odd one, but he could see where he could have gotten it, with him trying to fall asleep during the meal and conversation.

 

The boy looked pained for a moment and he and his sister exchanged another look. "No, it's not a nickname," he said softly. "Sleepy Ash is the only name that I go by."

 

"At least you have a name," he offered and they both stared at him in slight shock. "Never had the need to have one or if I had one once, I kinda forgot it." He rubbed the back of his head. "Don't need it if people can point out the one who goes to the square and acts. I can be all sorts of people from my stories."

 

"… I'm sure that will change in time."  A comforting arm was wrapped around his shoulders. "You'll find a reason to have someone call your name."

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

They let him back to the same courtyard that he had followed them to before, but they didn't even hesitate on the threshold before they were leading him inside. His estimation of what type of family they were went up; this was one of the more private hotels; the entire space could be rented out and it looked like it had been. Even if the place did look pretty empty…

 

Sleepy Ash stopped in front of a wide window, that was letting in plenty of afternoon sunlight. He stopped at the edge of it, where a long black snake was curled up in the beams. "Weirdo," he muttered, but didn't make any move to nudge the snake away.

 

"At least one of you enjoys sunlight," a voice teased from behind them. "I can't get the rest of you to be lazy in it."

 

"Envy's made to enjoy it," Sleepy Ash took a step away, while the snake looked up a little at the group. "I don't like it."

 

He noticed the snake looking at him, in that same weird, unnerving way that the cat did and shook it off. Sometimes he had too strong of an imagination, but … _this would be great for a dramatic story!_ He thought gleefully, before his attention was taken by the older man suddenly standing in front of him.

 

"Ahh--- I see my children found someone to bring home. It was our Mother, wasn't it?" he teased. "She's forever trying to take care of people." He slanted his gaze over to the woman and Sleepy Ash, who were standing next to each other, simply watching.

 

"Wouldn't you?" she asked, pushing her hair back. "He's hardly eaten a decent meal, I bet," she huffed. "The sort of thing needs to be fixed, before he goes on further." She crossed her arms over her chest and stared them all down. "Don't you agree, _Father_?"

 

He flushed and stepped away, feeling more annoyed now. "Hey—I eat plenty and I don't need something just given to me because you felt sorry for me," he snapped. He earned the coins and food he was given; it wasn't just outright charity.

 

"Of course you eat so much," the woman drawled. "When I could easily pick you up with one hand and not even struggle."

 

"… you're strong," he muttered, cheeks red. So what if he was a little scrawny? That didn't mean anything.

 

"Now, now—let's not upset your friend here." The man hadn't changed the smile on his face. "I heard that you act," he said. "And you're a native of the area—maybe you can show us where we can be more…comfortable than this hotel _and_ entertain us." He looked over at the others. "We always appreciate something new."

 

"And you go hunting for it," Sleepy Ash muttered under his breath.

 

He gave them all an uneasy smile; something felt a little off, but then the girl hugged him tightly around the shoulders. "Father and Sleepy Ash are always getting at each other," she reassured him. "Come on you—now that Father knows you're real, why don't you show me around?" She flicked her hair back. "I'll even find the cat for you to tag along."

 

The father laughed and shook his head when Sleepy Ash glared at her. "I think that's a marvelous idea. I'll try and find your other brother and then we can all sit down and discuss how your new friend can fit into this household."

 

_Isn't this moving a little too fast?_ He tried to push back the longing at the idea of belonging to a home, to people, to anything besides his corner of the market where he told stories and acted out scenes for pennies and scraps. He was smarter than this. He cleared his throat. "Didn't talk anything like that," he tried to keep his voice firm. "Just being a guide and stuff." He looked around. "And finding you a bigger place. Aren't there more of you?"

 

The man's eyes widened and he laughed, covering his mouth with his hand. "You really have been keeping an eye on us. I wonder how much about you already know."

 

"Not enough," Sleepy Ash muttered. His sister smacked him upside the head.

 

"Hush," she said. "You're going to make him think we're bad people. Father found all of us," she said firmly. "He's not a bad person and anyone that Father finds to be good for the house…"

 

He was starting to feel really stupid now as he looked between all of them. "Oh… you're not all—oh. That makes sense." He flushed for not coming to that conclusion earlier. "You're all…." He rubbed the back of head, trying to think of the word.

 

"We're all family," the man said firmly. "I'm not asking such a thing out of a stranger, you know." He grinned. "I know very well how it sounds. Let's start with friendship, hm? No one is forcing anyone to do anything here."

 

He nodded and looked around at the small group; he wondered where the rest of the family was, what they thought of it and what they would think of him intruding, but—it didn’t have to be forever. He could see what it was like and make his choices from there.

 

"…. I have to go," he muttered. "Gotta do a performance; they're already asked me to do it and…" And if he didn't, he couldn't count on being asked again. He couldn't count on this odd family to offer a hand if he wasn't going to do something useful.

 

He couldn't count on it all being a cruel lie and any chance of life he had on his own vanishing like smoke in the wind.

 

Their father nodded and patted him on the shoulder. "I understand, but I hope we didn't scare you too much," he smiled. "I have good instincts for this sort of thing and I think you coming with us would be a good idea."

 

He waved off the words with a flush and practically bolted out the door.

 

~

 

After the boy left, Sleepy Ash turned to the Mother and glared at her. "What if I want to scare him away?" he asked, rubbing at his eyes. "What if I don't want him being turned into another Sin?"

 

"I think he'd be perfect for our family." Wrath looked hopeful. "I thought so when I first saw him around town and from what all of you have told me about him. Didn't you see how eager he was at the idea of having a family?" she asked.

 

"Yeah, but we didn't tell him that none of us are human," Sleepy Ash snapped, "that we're a group of immortal monsters. If you're so eager to keep him around, why don't you make him your Eve and then let him have a normal, happy life?"

 

As normal of a life as an Eve could have, that was—they came with their own ups and downs. It was something all of them learned very quickly, when their Father showed them exactly what he had rewoven them into.

 

"Father wants him as one of us," she glared at him. "I don't want him wasted as an Eve and I'm not having the will of some kid bossing me around as he thinks that eating scraps that came from something a little better than a trash heap is a good thing," she snapped. Her expression softened at Sleepy Ash's look. "Don't you want him here, Sleepy Ash?" she asked gently. "We could all take care of him. Even you're attached to the dramatic kid."

 

Sleepy Ash shrugged and shoved his hands in his pockets. "It doesn't mean that he needs to be changed," he muttered. "The kid doesn't even have a _name_ ," he muttered.

 

"Then less for him to miss when I give him one," Father draped his arm around Sleepy Ash's shoulders. "Come now, are any of my children really unhappy?" he asked. "We're all a family, when some of us may not have that chance at all. Isn't that the most important?"

 

Wrath gave him a hug from the other side. "I like having you all here," she said quietly. "I can keep an eye on all of you better this way—"

 

"No wonder why we call you the Mother," Sleepy Ash managed a smile and pulled away. She was both older and younger than him—he would never age past eighteen, but he had been eighteen for longer than she had been alive.

 

Doubt Doubt looked up from his spot in the sun, shifting back to his more human form. "Father wants a theme," he said softly. "He won't stop until he has seven." He had noticed the pattern, he had noticed the names.

 

Their father laughed and tugged him into the group. "Of course, of course. Such a nice number and theme. Don't you think it's been long enough since I found some so suited?" he asked. "The last one we tried wasn't so well suited and…"

 

Sleepy Ash grimaced and looked away. He had seen what had happened to all of their father's failed experiments. He was about to ask where the last member of their family was when the bat landed on top of his head and he wrinkled his nose.

 

"Hello, Old Child," he held out his hand so that his brother could perch at the edge of his fingertips. "Find anything interesting about the kid?" He hadn't felt right about spying on him anymore than he already had and it was more dangerous for a cat in that part of town alone than Kuro was willing to expend any energy avoiding.

 

"A great deal," the formal form came from the bat and a flick of light and his brother hung off his arm for a moment before dropping to the ground. "Also, not much of substance at all. He lives on the street, in a hovel of a corner. No one notices him outside of his performances, yet he draws the eye when he does act upon his small stage." He sniffed and straightened his clothes. "I think he would be entirely suitable to join our esteemed family."

 

Sleepy Ash caught the implications all too well. No one would bat an eye when the boy went missing. A bit of regret for losing a talented entertainer, but those were so easily replaced as well.

 

"Now, it would be a shame to see him alone and without family or friends." Their father sounded entirely too reasonable for the atrocities that would have to occur to make the boy one of them. It was cruel to offer hope and family at the price that would have to be paid for _this_ one. "How do you think we should let him know that we want him with us?"

 

"Don't scare him away by offering our home right away," Kuro advised, slumping down. His father's mind was already made up and with Wrath protective of him and Pride giving his tactic approval, there was no going back. It was best just to go with it and protect the kid as much as he could… and be there for when he realized that the path he set his feet on was already crumbling behind him.

 

"We'll take care of him," Wrath said firmly. "It's not always easy—" she wasn't so far gone into protecting the family that she couldn’t admit that. "We are a family, though and one that he'll never lose." She held him tightly; she cared for all of them with a fierceness that was startling at times. "It's better than being alone."

 

"I, for one, am eager to see what sort of traits our father will imbue our newest brother with," Pride mused. "He is ever talented and I am sure the newest member will not be stinted in what gifts he will receive."

 

"I already have a marvelous plan in mind for him," Father reassured him. "Now we just wait until he comes to us and bit by bit, he'll fit right in and become part of the family."

 

Sleepy Ash just shook his head and let Doubt Doubt transform back into his snake form and wrap around his arm. His youngest brother understood his feelings on the matter; he knew the pain and sacrifice that was involved, even if the offer was tempting at the start. He knew that Doubt Doubt cared for his family a great deal, as Sleepy Ash did, but they both knew that at their recreated cores, they were monsters.

 

"Well, hopefully he'll want to stay once he figures out what we are," Sleepy Ash sighed and leaned back, avoiding the sunlight. He wasn't in the mood to be a cat right now. "We can't exactly erase his memory so that he forgets vampires are real."

 

"Still working on that," their father said cheerfully. "Now is not the time for it—even if he did tell anyone what we were, would they even believe him? Most think that actors are half-deranged as it is. No… there won’t be any problems, either way."

 

"Just give him a halfway decent name," Sleepy Ash muttered. "It's hard to introduce yourself when you have to call yourself Sleepy Ash."

 

His father's expression changed. "That's not for me to give; I gave you those names and made you how you are so that you can find an Eve and serve them. They are the ones that gift you with a name." He forced Sleepy Ash to look up at him. "Don't you want to have that bond with someone?"

 

"Too much work," he sighed. "Too much of a pain to deal with one person—" he gave them a brief smile. "It's already too much trouble with all of you," he teased. He relaxed a little; they weren't going to force the kid into this life. Trick him, maybe—lure him in with the security of a family and a home and not having to worry about food or the cold again… but he wouldn't be held down and given no choices about the life he would have to live with for eternity.

 

And perhaps… it wouldn't be all that bad to have a new sibling and this actor-kid wasn't all that bad, not really. They had plenty of time to learn about each other before there was no going back.


	3. Chapter 3

It was a clear, sunny sort of day and he was disappointed to find none of the siblings about, but he couldn't help but be a little happy at their father by his side this time. It was time for part of his bargain; trying to find a place that would be suitable for such a large family and their odd collection of animals.

 

The cat _was_ part of the family and so was the snake and a bat and a dog that looked more like a wolf than anything else. It was an incredible group and it itched him to learn more about them and their story and how they ended here.

 

"Are you uncomfortable with the clothes?" He looked up from tugging at the new clothes and flushed. "…no. They're just too nice. Are you sure that Sleepy Ash won't mind?" he asked. They were a little baggy on him, but infinitely more fitting for this area of town than any of the rags he owned. He would have to go back to those rags; lest he get robbed or beaten back home, but for the purpose of finding a decent place, he couldn't stick out or shame the person he was with.

 

"Sleepy Ash volunteered," came the reassurance. "Now—you're saying this part of town would be good?" he asked, gesturing to the sparse collection of houses. "Doesn't seem as if there is much of a town at all," he teased. "Are you trying to lure me out of a safe area?"

 

He huffed at that and rolled his eyes. "If I was gonna do that, I'd be sneakier about it," he pointed out. Really, he hadn't been entirely a good person, he'd admit and sometimes things got a little lean and desperate… "This isn't that type of place to pull such a trick anyway," he muttered. "It's private and all, but it's really got a lot of rich people and stuff and …." He stared at his boots, trying to think of how to explain it.

 

"Where no one will ask questions about the family?" The father asked gently. "You've already noticed some of our oddities and you're thinking about it, hm?" He rested a hand on his shoulder. "You notice a great deal."

 

"I have to," he explained, eyes shifting everywhere and taking in how they were assessed. "I'm an actor," he said proudly. Even if his stage was small and scanty and no one but the occasional passerby was drawn into his stories, he still considered himself as such. "If I don't look for what the audience wants, I can't do the stories right."

 

The people here watched him, too—listened to his lower-class of speech, of how he sat uncomfortably in borrowed clothes to big for him. They knew he didn't belong, but the man that walked beside him whispered quietly of wealth and knowledge and being even above this place. There were nicer places with more extravagant homes; but sometimes hitting the middle ground was easier and to establish yourself in a place and let it grow up around you was the smartest of all.

 

"You really do well best when manipulating the stage…" the words seemed almost disconnected from what he really meant, but he let it go; there was a type of pride in his words that made him oddly happy inside.

 

"I…. I've always acted out stuff," he said uncertainly, turning his gaze over to one of the more out of the way homes; slightly out of repair, but large and empty. "It makes me feel alive."

 

"To tell other people's stories?" They paused at the threshold of the house. "Why not tell your own stories on your own stage? Wouldn't you like to be able to have that chance to manipulate the world around you and let your own voice be heard?"

 

"You can make any story your own," he shrugged it off, rocking back on his feet and looking up at the house. "This sorta place is good. Not many people around… no one's gonna harp at you for having animals and kids and stuff around."

 

"And there is a lot of space for my research, too—" he stepped forward and examined the place from all angles. "Hmm…. This is a good start. Why don't you show me other places and we can make an informed choice? It's always good to know what else is out there."

 

He nodded, eager to be of help and to spend more time with the father of the family.

 

~

 

He didn't expect to be invited back to stay when the day was over; there was helping out for the meal from before and there was expecting more to be handed out to him. _All you did was show him around…_

 

But he had liked it, more than he thought he would. It wasn't just the nicer clothing, or the small bakery they had stopped by to get a small meal in between all the walking. It was talking to the man, leaning that he liked to travel; that he enjoyed the arts and music and has been very lonely until he started gathering his family to him.

 

"They… they seem to really care for you," he said hesitantly. He had seen many more families that didn't have that sort of bond. It was how he ended up how he did; if he had a family that gave him a name and a home, he could no longer remember it.

 

"My children are very loyal," he laughed. "We had our rocky starts and we still have shaky moments, but I love them all. What about your family?" he asked. "We spent all this time talking about my children, but you never said if you had any siblings of your own."

 

"No… don't have anyone," he shrugged it off. "Just me and my stage," he grinned broadly, as if were enough for everything. "Who needs to have someone leaning over your shoulder or stealing your bread or candy if you've got the whole town calling your name out?" Granted, it wasn't _his_ name, but whatever name they gave him. Sometimes it was the poet, the dreamer—the idiot or the scrawny actor. No real names, but nicknames that stuck for a while before someone else gave him a new one.

 

"It's so much fun when someone's teasing you, though," he laughed. "And a special name just for you is the best thing of all. I want all my children to have that." His voice trailed off when his gaze drifted back towards where the temporary home they had set for themselves. "I don’t want them to ever be without one."

 

"A name?" he blinked at that, a little confused. "But you can't just not have a name…" He flushed; he didn't have any room to talk on that and he rushed through his next words. "I mean—they all have names and—"

 

"But there is always a name someone special calls you, one that they give you." He smiled and ushered him along through the streets, as if he were the one leading and teaching. "Didn't you mother or father ever call you something special?"

 

He shook his head and tucked his hands into his pockets. He didn't want to say so much about himself; he didn't want pity or odd looks or worse—for them to leave him entirely on the basis that he really wasn't worth more than a few coins. "Nah—I just have people call me whatever," he grinned. "It's more exciting to see what names they can come up with."

 

"Well, we'll think of a good name to call you." There was a fatherly ruffling of his hair. "Now—come back to the hotel; you can change back if you want, but I know my daughter will give me quite a lecture if I return without you."

 

He blinked at that, more than a little surprised, but he shook his head. He couldn't show himself being too eager; they'd think he was greedy or a thief and suspect him to do something wrong. "I'll… return the clothes," he said, rubbing the back of his head. "But I should get… home.. after that."

 

He was given a 'that's what you think' look, which he didn't know how to interpret. "Ah, well, if that's what you want," he said lightly. "Come along, then. It's getting dark and all my children will be home. I don't think you met everyone."

 

"I… I think I saw everyone, but…" he rubbed the back of his head. He didn't know all their names; he'd seen the random animals more than he had the people and they were all friendly in their own way. His favorite was the cat, who would lay over on one hand while he fed him with the other.

 

"Then there isn't any harm in at least staying long enough to say hello." The hand on his back was firm and pushed him along without any compromise. It didn't take them long to get back to the narrow alley with the hotel, the lamps barely lit in this area, but there was warm light spilling out of the windows of the hotel and he heard more voices there than he had before.

 

His heart hurt a little at how friendly it all sounded and he followed inside a little reluctantly, freezing for a moment when all eyes landed on him. He was an _actor_ , though and he was used to be stared at him. He put a bright grin on his face and waved to the group. "Sorry it took so long."

 

"Hmph. Go and sit down," the sister snapped, pointing to the table. "Dinner's just about to be served. You could have come back earlier and helped clean up…" her voice took a lecturing tone and he blinked, taken off guard.

  
"Ah… I mean—I'm just going to return the clothes and…get home—I mean—I was going …" He barely got a step back when she was next to him and gripping his shoulder, forcing him down at the table.

 

"You are not going anywhere. Did you notice how dark is it out there? You—scrawny and weak as you are, you wouldn't survive walking back to your home. You're eating and then you're staying here tonight."  There wasn't even the option of a question in her voice and he found himself bristling a little.

 

"I'm not weak!" He protested. "I've lived out on my own in this area for a long time!" He realized his mistake a moment later and covered his mouth, ears turning red. "I mean—" He was going to get up, but her hand was still on his shoulder and pressing down, keeping him in place.

 

Sleepy Ash smirked from his spot next to him, brushing his hair out of his eyes. "We learned not to argue with her," he offered. "It's easier to just give in. Less painful, too." That earned him a smack and her other hand lifting his head from the table.

 

"You shouldn't sleep at the table," the youngest of them scolded, sitting across from them, halfway perched on the table. "It's rude, Sleepy Ash."

 

"I'm living up to my full potential. Look at how well I resemble my name."

 

"I'm going to shove you out into the sun," his sister threatened.

 

"Good thing it's already gone to bed." He yawned. "Can we eat so I can go to bed?" He turned his head and gave him a slow wink, obviously enjoying the game and sharing the joke.

 

"You're going to scare your friend away," the quiet one murmured, head hanging low as he sat in the darkest corner of the room. "I haven't properly met him yet."

 

"I haven't either, but it rude be rude of us to interrogate him and ruin our sister's dinner when she's worked so hard on it." The smallest managed to sound the most pretentious and he had a sudden image of one of the nobles that had stopped through the town, same imperious expression and all. "We already know something of him, but since I am sure he won't be rude and leave, we will find out more after."

 

The gaze he fixed on him was even more imperious than the noble's and he shivered a little at how strong willed he and his sister seemed to be. _Someone that young shouldn't be that full of themselves,_ he thought sourly, but he didn't get up again, either. It helped that the food in front of him smelled amazing and he had a sense that they weren't just teasing amongst themselves; they were including him in the atmosphere of a family.

 

It almost hurt; this temporary happiness of having something like a family; something that was very much what he was seeing as friends, at the very least. He had moments like this before, brief and happy and then they were gone again.

 

He wanted to believe that this one would last.

 

~

 

He tried once more to leave after dinner was over and he was back in his own ragged clothes—sure it was dark out, but it wasn't like there was monsters out there. He knew how to defend himself and had for a long time. He was glad that they hadn't pushed the issue of his slip up, but he wasn't going to be seen as some freeloader.

 

He hadn't counted on the absolute take-no-prisoners nature of the sister, though and he stared up at her in baffled disbelief, trying to form an argument, but there was none forthcoming. Sleepy Ash was already curled up on the soft couch, so there was no hope from that end.

 

"Did it suddenly become sunny when I wasn't looking?" She crossed her arms and stared down at him. "I believe that the sun didn't come up after dinner was finished and so my argument for you staying here still stands. There's plenty of room, you can stay in Sleepy Ash's room, since he's being lazy and sleeping here."

 

Sleepy Ash opened one eye and snorted. "Just offer my space—" he muttered. "It's fine. Too much of a pain to move anyway." He yawned again.

 

"… but I have a place to go and I'm not a kid," he groused. "I'm an adult, you know." He crossed his arms over his chest and bristled with irritation. The bath and clothes and all the running around had made his already ragged hair stand out more in irritated spikes.

 

"You look like a pissed off hedgehog right now," she laughed and ruffled his hair. "Why is it so hard to just accept a place to stay, hm? It's a hotel, you earned a room, so just suck it up and take it. You can go frolic back among the masses tomorrow. We won't follow you or anything." Her expression softened. "Don't worry so much about your secrets being uncovered. We all have them."

 

"Hedgehog?" He laughed and tried to smooth out his hair. "You have hedgehogs in this house, too?" he shook his head. "I… I just—" he made a face. "I'm not begging or anything for a place to stay. I mean—"

 

"Hey," she knelt down next to him. "You're our friend, aren't you? You talk to us and helped us out, I don't see a lot of people doing that here." She wrapped her arms around him tightly. "It's okay. You can stay here and still have your life out there."

 

He blinked and nodded, rubbing at his eyes. He wasn't some kid to cry over something like this, but he felt unbelievably grateful towards this family for the hand they extended. It didn't mean he was going to trust the offer right away, but…

 

…for now, he'd accept it.

 

"I guess I don't have much of a choice," he turned his head away as if it was the hardest choice to make. "I can't make a girl upset with me, after all."

 

She smacked him lightly as easily as she had her brother. As she stood up, she shook her head. "Come on then- I'll show you where you're staying for the night."  She lifted him up as if he weighed nothing at all and led him deeper into the hotel, a lantern lighting the way.

 

~

 

"A hedgehog…" Father laughed and sat back on the couch, next to Sleepy Ash. "The Mother really does have an interesting way of looking at things. I won't even try for anything else; I can picture it quite clearly."

 

Sleepy Ash gave a snort. "He gets all prickly and offended, she really isn't far off the mark with that assessment." He sat up a little and crossed his arms behind his head and looked toward his other siblings. "I'm surprised you didn't interrogate him about his home, Pride."

 

His brother shrugged at that. "What should I have said?" he asked, raising an eyebrow. "To tell him that we know he is living in on the streets would prick his … pride to the point where he wouldn't come around to us any longer. He already let it out that he does not have a proper home and to pursue that would be incredibly rude."  He paused in his speech to look down at the watch in his hands and frowned.

 

"If you'll excuse me, my time is almost up. My Eve will be waiting."

 

"Go, go—" Their father waved him away. "I have that time limit for a reason; if they're in pain, then it's a bad thing and bonds will be tender. Go to your Eve and care for them and then join us again when they give you leave to."

 

"I will make sure that I am here for when the final choice is made," Old Child bowed his head and hurried out the door, a small children in the dark.

 

~

 

He watched the youngest of the family leave and his brow furrowed, wondering why they allowed such a thing, when he was forcibly made to stay, on the account of 'danger' to himself. The child didn't go too far and he kept his eyes trained on the smaller hotel and the small girl that came out of a side door, hugging him fiercely and dragging him outside.

 

He wanted to ask… but he _was_ tired and it could wait until the morning. He blew out the flame from the lantern next to the bed and resolved to find out what he could about this family; even indirectly.

 

 

 

 


	4. Chapter 4

When the morning light slanted through the window, he hadn't forgotten his resolve to find out more of what was going on, but he was feeling warm and comfortable enough to not move, especially with the black cat resting on top of him, weighing him down.

 

"You know, I never asked your name," he said softly, petting over the soft fur. "I mean, names are pretty big in this household. Wonder what they named you—maybe I should give you a name," he teased. "Just between the two of us."

 

The cat opened his eyes at that and gave him what could only be described as a look of pure panic before he ran off, leaving him alone. "I didn't think it was that bad of an idea," he muttered, feeling as if it were a personal thing, not something that could have startled the cat. That was the more likely scenario. He looked out the window again, eyes going to the hotel across the way and the little girl that had brought in the youngest of the household.

 

"I don't know his name, either," he muttered to himself. He expected not to have a name of his own, but an entire family of adopted children would have had names, especially with a father that cared so much about them. He pushed away the blankets and wondered if it was possible to sneak out of the hotel with no one noticing, but he had a feeling the cat would know and somehow tell the others.

 

He realized how quiet it was in the hotel and for the first time, he wondered just how this hotel was so empty of anyone but the family. There were no other guests or staff were here, and a chill went down his spine. Something wasn't adding up. If they already had this place to themselves, why did they need him to find a new one?

 

The sister of the family was the one that cooked the meals and she had led him to Sleepy Ash's room. There was no one else cleaning up or moving around or…he shook his head and tried to think logically. Rich people were weird…but didn't they like having people do stuff for them?

 

He didn't realize he was sitting on the edge of the bed in a daze until Sleepy Ash cleared his throat and stared down at him, again he was just at the edge of where the sunlight hit the bed.

 

"My sister wants to make sure you have food before you go running off again," he rubbed the back of his head. "I half expected to find you climbing out the window."

 

His gaze went to the window again and he winced. "I thought about it," he admitted, getting to his feet and watching Sleepy Ash cautiously. There was a different sort of tenseness about him. "But then I didn't want to feel like I was… being sneaky about it."

 

Besides, he wanted answers; if he ran away, he wouldn't get the ones that he needed.

 

Sleepy Ash just shook his head. "Stay here long enough and you'll think about weirder things than just wanting to jump out windows." Backing away, he led him out of the room and into the main area, where half the windows were open and only letting in a minimal of sunlight.

 

"You guys really hate the sun," he observed, sitting down in the bright patch and closing his eyes, letting the warmth wash over him. "More for me~' he was still half asleep and relaxing back into gentle heat of the sunlight.

 

He didn't see the looks exchanged around the table at  his comment, Sleepy Ash looking sad for a moment and then glaring up at his father, who only shrugged in response. Just because he liked laying out in the sun didn't mean he was going to change his mind.

 

"I don't hate it," Sleepy Ash muttered, reaching out to tug at his hair lightly, hand barely in the sunlight. "I just don't like it in my eyes and it's too bright and early." He yawned and retreated a little. "You've seen me outside in it before." He had to take a risk and there was a hint of a smile on his face. "Or did you think I was some sort of vampire to melt in the sun?"

 

There was a long, tense silence and Sleepy Ash turned to his sister, who looked ready to smack him, to his brother who looked both scandalized and amused in turns. No guessing at his father's expression and the silence was only broken by laughter.

 

"Yeah—like vampires exist," he shook his head and sat up, stretching, as if the little break in the sunshine was all he needed to wake up fully. "Good joke, though—" he looked thoughtful. "Maybe I should tell that story next… a vampire story!" He grinned fully at the group around him. "People like scary stories, right?"

 

"They'll be terrified," Sleepy Ash deadpanned and stood up to stand over his sister's side, peering down at the food. "Are we going to eat soon?" he asked, resting his chin on her shoulder, earning a swat.

 

"Yes and then you're going to make yourself useful and get…" she hesitated for a split second and then hurried on. "E…edmund from next door."

 

"… oh—that's his name now…" If he hadn't been paying attention, he wouldn't have heard that last part. "Yeah, yeah—I'll go and get him before it gets too late in the day." Sleepy Ash grimaced at the sunlight and then flicked his gaze over to where he was sitting. "Unless you can go get him. He's just next door."

 

"… alright…" he felt something wasn’t being said here, but at least he could get one of his questions answered. "Why is he over there anyway?" he asked. "I saw him leave last night…who was that girl?" Wasn't he a bit too young to be arranging midnight play dates? Who _did_ that?

 

"He's with his Eve," the quietest of the brothers murmured. "He likes to check up on her when he is this close."

 

"… his… oh. Her name is Eve." He nodded and got to his feet, nose twitching at the smell of the bacon frying. Sometimes the quietest one said things oddly, but he was easy enough to understand. "I guess I can go over and get him." The thought of using the opportunity to sneak away didn't even occur to him; breakfast smelled too good. Everyone else seemed to be doing something to prepare for breakfast, even if it was just gathering plates or pouring some sort of hot tea into mugs.

 

He sauntered over to the other side and the rest of the family watched him go.

 

"Hope he picks a shady spot or else he's going to have a shock much faster than we had planned," Wrath muttered. Father watched with curiosity. It wouldn't entirely be a bad thing for the child to find out something now, but he wasn't quite prepared to pull him in yet. He wanted there to be no way back.

 

"Well, we'll see if he's entirely stupid or he can pick up some clues," he allowed. "I want him to figure out some of it by himself."

 

~

 

The hotel next door was a normal sort of one; with a real lobby and staff and he was suddenly feeling very self-conscious as all eyes turned him in his ragged clothes. Even if it wasn't the classiest of hotels, he still stuck out obviously and he didn't even have much to go by, except an Edmund name and who know how many people here had such a fancy name?

 

He grabbed at one of the people in uniform, who sneered down at him and he gulped slightly, before pushing back and presenting himself as he would on stage, giving back the same disdainful look, as if he wasn't dressed in rags.

 

"I need Edmund back," he said firmly. It was a calculated gamble and he hoped it'd pay off before they threw him out. The family was counting on him and he wasn't about to turn back without something to show for it.

 

He was in luck, when instead of being thrown out, a couple stopped by at the sound of the name. "Edmund?" the older of them asked. ".. ah, our little girl's companion. They're upstairs, I'll have her come down." The mother gave him a once over. "I must say, they usually let him go out on his own. Are you new to the family, dear? I'm surprised you're out…" her voice lowered, "in such bright sunlight. We were going to wait until sun had moved a little."

 

He swallowed and gave her a charming smile. "I'm just a friend of the family, but they asked me to come and get…get him." He wanted to stuff his hands in his pockets, but this clothing didn't have any pockets. "I can get him back okay." _Sunlight again…_

 

"…they trust you enough with him," she shook her head and gestured for one of the staff, murmuring something too quiet for him to hear, but he was already moving off. "I think you already are a part of the family and just don't know it yet." She patted his hand and smiled at him. "Here comes Edmund now."

 

He nodded slowly when the young boy came down the stairs, hand in hand with a young girl, who was leading the way through patches of sunlight like it was a particularly fun game, jumping from step to step. He followed her patiently, but he put a little energy into it and there was a hint of a smile  on his face.

 

Edmund—he shook his head, he couldn't think of him as that; it was too odd and he was more used to the Pride name that Sleepy Ash called him or Old Child as a nickname. Those seemed far more fitting to the serious child in front of him. Edmund paused in front of him, eyebrows raising.

 

"Well, lift me up and carry me across the street," he ordered. "If Father or one of my siblings asked you to do this, then there was a reason and it wasn’t to hold my hand. I am perfectly capable of making my own way across an uncrowded street."

 

"I think I got that much," he muttered, lifting the kid up easily. This could not be a kid. Maybe a really small adult. "If you can walk, why am I carrying you?"

 

"Because I said so," came the reply and a light smack on the top of his head. He turned to face the family and gave a shrug. He didn't really know if this was the right thing to do or not; it was better just to play along for now.

 

"That's perfectly fine," the mother smiled at him. "Cassandra will have him again over later, but it's best that he spend time with his family as well. We will probably see you again soon, for the time that we spend here. It's important that he be with his family for now."

 

He blinked and nodded, not quite getting the meaning behind the words, but … "Yeah—I guess you're right. I…it was nice meeting you." He looked around the surroundings of the hotel, which were to him, quite nice and something he'd like to have in his life.

 

He was brought out of his musings by another sharp hit and an imperious voice in his ear. "Onward, young actor. I can smell breakfast from here and I am sure that you are eager to scamper away again once the meal has been finished."

 

He bristled at the insinuation and almost wanted to just prove him wrong and stay the _whole damn day_ , but he also wanted to find a new spot to set up a stage, wanted new people to entice to his side so that they could see what he could accomplish with words. He wanted to see if he had enough coins to find another book to buy, for stories to adapt to his stage.

 

He had to get back to his small nook, where everything he owned was hidden away before too long, before it was all stolen away by thieves cleverer than he was. Not that his odd collection of ragtag stories and small mementos would be worth anything, but the fear that something he had would be taken away couldn't be shaken.

 

"Aha… I am right," the boy snickered and goaded him across the street. He sidestepped patches of sunlight automatically, following the trends of the family already when he was carrying one of the members of the family. Maybe they all burned horribly in the sun or something and wasn't going to fail at something as simple as bringing home a kid.

 

Although that _young actor_ comment—he huffed quietly to himself as he stepped through the door of the family's temporary home and deposited his charge on the floor. He was positive that the kid couldn't be a kid, but then again, nobody in the family acted like anyone he knew. Maybe this was how normal people acted.

 

He hovered uncertainly around the doorway, not sure if he should sit down or if the request to pick up their sibling was a subtle hint to leave. His stomach growling loudly seem to decide things and Sleepy Ash rolled his eyes and pointed to the seat next to him. "You're going to have to get used to this," he said softly. "My sister is very stubborn."

 

"I… I guess," he was caught off guard as he made his way to the table, head brimming with questions, but uncertain of where he would even start or what to say. He stared down at his plate, biting his lip and looking at the family out of the corner of his eye.

 

"The family that… " he stumbled over the name, _Edmund_ seemed wrong and he couldn't make himself say it. "That he was staying with… they seem nice. They asked me… they asked me if I was part of the family." He tapped his fingers on his leg nervously, anxious to be moving around again, filled with a nervous energy that wasn't well suited for sitting at the table, no matter how good the bacon and hotcakes smelled.  "Sorry?" he asked.

 

"Why should you be sorry?" Father asked, resting his cheek on one hand as he ate without caring, watching him the entire time. "Did they say anything else to you?" Despite his casual pose, his question was weighted and he fidgeted again.

 

"….they thought it was weird I was out in the sun," he said softly, stuffing his face before he had to answer another question.

 

"Interesting," the father mused. "They talk about so much that they're uncertain about, but they're good people. It's a shame we only see them for a short time before they're off again until the following year…perhaps we can follow them this time to their other vacation spots."

 

"You just want to keep an eye on your son," the sister pushed another platter of food in the middle of the table. "That's why we came here in the first place." She smiled over at him. "Not that it didn't have an odd benefit other than a new place to explore…"

 

"You—you travel a lot?" he asked, uncertain. "Then—you really don't need a place to stay here?" He was starting to get irritated; did they just use him…? _For what? Conning you into eating good food and having a place to stay?_

 

"Calm down, hedgehog," she rolled her eyes at him, but she was obviously enjoying her new nickname for him and it wasn't one that he ever had, but at least he was getting called _something_ by them. "We decided to settle here for awhile and we can't stay in this hotel forever. The staff is already making noises about kicking us out."

 

"Staff?" He looked around, he hadn't seen any yet.

 

"Oh, they're all next door," she waved it off. "This is technically part of that hotel, but we've come here a lot and so they… understand us. They just told us that this was the last time, so …" she shrugged. "We'll still travel, but when we come back here, we'll have a place of our own."

 

He swallowed hard, the food sitting like a rock in his stomach. They'd leave… and even if they came back, he'd have just been one odd person they had seen on their stay, no matter how nice they were being now. Maybe that was why they were being so nice now, because they would soon be gone.

 

"We travel a lot," Sleepy Ash offered. "Some of us more than others. I like staying at home." He yawned and stretched, laying his head on the table again. "Too much energy to keep moving around."

 

"You're just lazy," Father said, expression fond. "You do enough when you're properly motivated; you just need to find that person that gives you a purpose."

 

"Someone energetic enough for our Sleepy Ash?" the youngest laughed as he cut up his breakfast in small, specific bites. "That would be the day, indeed… although our actor here has already proven himself to make our brother move about more than I would expect."

 

He grinned widely when Sleepy Ash just shook his head and didn't even protest, instead just sat up and tugged at the back of his scarf. "So troublesome…" he murmured. "Do you like to travel?" he asked. His eyes were more awake as he looked at him.

 

"…I haven't ever left this town," he said, unsure of where this was going. "I mean—I know this place and the people." He rocked back in his chair, perching back at a precarious angle. "And who would I go see?" he shrugged it off.

 

"You can always learn more by traveling," that came from the youngest and he rapped hard on the top of his head. "You can't think it is so simple to tell the same stories over again and not grow from them. One learns from traveling and meeting all new people and exploring new environments."

 

He yelped, rubbing his head and glaring at the kid. "I read," he muttered. "I don't just stare at the crowd and make something up. I… I read stories that give me ideas so I can show other people."

 

"Still, travel will bring new stories and audiences and experiences." Their father smiled down at him and righted his chair with a loud thump before it could tip all the way backward. "You never know what a new environment will bring you."

 

He thought about the short time he had spent with this family and nodded slowly. It didn't mean he was going to pack up and leave, trailing them like some sort of abandoned puppy, but maybe one day—he would get a chance to explore.

 

But for right now—he snatched at the plate of bacon and eggs, a wide grin on his face, falling into the teasing of the family with ease for once. He would just enjoy the moment _now_.

 

~

 

He got into a sort of routine after that; he found himself at their place more and more; taking time out of find a home that was big enough and unobtrusive enough for all of them. There were questions that came up in his mind every so often, but they were always answered…in a fashion. He brushed it off each time, knowing that he _wasn't_ family and didn't actually have a right to know, no matter how often he spent time with them.

 

He was comfortable enough with them that he stashed his books there. That he would do odd jobs for them during the day that didn't involve them going out into the sun. That he didn't spend every free moment of time doing new shows and stealing, just so he'd have somewhere safe to stay and something always to eat. He was starting to trust them more and more.

 

It was because he was running errands for them that he started hearing words whispered about the family and even _he_ was staring to get odd looks. Not that he hadn't gotten suspicious looks in the past, but these were almost… scared and not because they thought he was a thief.

 

The oddest incident was when he was shoved from the path he had been walking on, but no one went to hurt him, but plenty of people stared. It wasn't until after that he realized he had been sticking to the shadier patches, a habit he had picked up whenever he went out with the siblings.

 

He let them all trickle to the back of his mind; it was getting dark and he had planned to stay in his own nook tonight and he headed to the house to let them know. That had also become a habit, as if he were checking in for permission, to let them know that he was alive. They had become a family to him in a very real sense and it was almost frightening.

 

He stopped in his tracks when he came  in the house, the sister bent over a man that was pale and shaking, blood covering the left side of his body. She was licking up the blood and he blanched, backing away and slamming into the door, causing her to look up at him, eyes narrowed and first and then shock spreading throughout her gaze.

 

"Hedgehog—it's not what it looks like—" he noticed her hand was gentle on the man, but all he could see was the blood that was covering the both of them.

 

He shook his head rapidly and wrenched open the door, bolting. He didn't notice the small black streak darting after him, he just needed to get away for the moment, breath coming sharply in his chest. _Vampires_ _aren't real_ , but murderers were and …. He couldn't believe that she would be someone like that.

 

He paused and turned, half-intending to go back, when the shadows seemed to gather in a looming force, before condensing into the form of Sleepy Ash. He stared, mouth dropping open and the boy sighed and rubbed the back of his head.

 

"What a pain… guess the secret's out."


	5. Chapter 5

Someone that was as relaxed about life as Sleepy Ash was shouldn't seem so frightening, but he found himself frozen in place, unable to look away from that calm gaze. The shadows seemed to deepen around him for a moment, but in the next, all that was left was the boy he had started to think of as an older brother.

 

"Sleepy Ash?" his voice broke at the end and he hesitated in moving; either back or forward. Sleepy Ash simply took his sleeve gently and tugged him closer.

 

"Come on, we can't talk about this out here. I promise… we'll explain it all to you." He hadn't even gotten that far from their home and he was suddenly conscious of other people still around, either through the soft voices through open windows or shoppers or pedestrians still on their business. There were more offhand looks given to them and he swallowed, not wanting anyone else involved. They were right… and I didn't put enough clues together.

 

He waited until they were in the small courtyard of the house before he spoke again. "… are you… are you guys really vampires?" he hated how ridiculous the words sounded out loud; it wasn't a story or a play of any sort; something so odd couldn’t be real. Still… the sunlight and the blood and the way people avoided them…

 

Sleepy Ash just sighed and he nearly jumped out of his skin when the small figure came out of the dark, a candle highlighting his features. "Yes, we are vampires," the child murmured. "You willingly walked into our home and now you see the…urk…." His voice was cut off when the quietest of the family lifted him up in the air.

 

"Come inside." His voice was quiet and measured as always. "Father wants to talk to you and the Mother needs to explain."  He shook his brother and he saw a hint of a scowl. "What are you thinking?" he asked. "This is something … that has to be said slowly."

 

He backed away into Sleepy Ash's chest, who just nudged him forward. "I'm sorry," Sleepy Ash whispered. "You should have found out in a better way than this." There was hardly any force applied, but he found himself instead just the same, the entire front room lit up with candles and lanterns. The sister of the family was missing, but everyone else was there.

 

"Did she make him her subclass?" Sleepy Ash asked, pushing him down into a seat, one hand braced on his shoulder and keeping him immobile. "He was pretty far gone…"

 

"She's with him now," Father gave his son a faint smile. "I think he'll do quite nicely and you know that she'll watch out for him." He focused completely on him "Well, the cat is out of the bag, as they say—what do you think of what you saw and what are you going to do about it?"

 

"Uh…" he tried to get his scrambled brains to work and he found himself speechless for a few moments. It was all so surreal. Everything was warm and comfortable like it always was, they were sitting around the table and it was like most nights. If it wasn’t for what he had seen, if he really had seen that and hadn't overreacted, but…

 

"…you said you were actually vampires?" he turned to the kid, a smile trying to form on his face and he laughed weakly. "Is that just a joke? A metaphor for something else?" he liked using metaphors in his plays, they were fun to play with and sometimes they came off quite well.

 

"No, my children are all vampires," the father's voice was calm and almost faintly amused. "A type of vampire, at least. I can't have my children so weak that they would die by any normal conventions."

 

"We can't die at all," Sleepy Ash muttered under his breath and he turned enough to gaze up at Sleepy Ash and just saw nothing of his teasing manner, but a sort of resigned, tired expression on his face. "Father…found all of his children, in one manner or another. He changed us into something not-quite a vampire, but no longer human."

 

"Mm… it's been a pet project of mine for a long time now," the father continued, a proud smile on his face. "Everyone agreed, Sleepy Ash—" he gave him a winning smile. "I explain quite clearly if they're suited to be with us…" His gaze was intense and he gulped slightly.

 

"Stop manipulating him and explain more," a voice snapped and he turned to see the sister come in. "He caught me in a way that is really hard to explain normally." She sat down next to him, her expression looking more tired than usual.

 

"Hey. In all those stories you say you read, you know vampires can make other vampires, right?" she asked and when he gave a quick nod, she continued. Strangely, he wasn’t really scared of them, he was … confused. Uncertain and not sure at all where this was going. "We can do it—but only if they're about to die. That guy—he got stabbed, right on our doorstep. He wanted to live and …" she gave him a half a smile. "He was always nice to me. Brought me flowers and such. He deserved another chance."

 

"…is he going to be part of your family?" he asked, staring down at his lap. "I mean… if you made him a vampire…"

 

"No. He's going to be an ordinary vampire. Father calls them our subclass; we make them from our blood and they listen to us—but they're not part of this sort of family." Her gaze didn't leave us. "Father is the one that chooses new family members." Her lips twisted up into a smile. "He has a theme going."

 

"… a theme?" he looked to the four family members, with their father at the head of the table.

 

"Why don't you all properly introduce yourselves to our curious little hedgehog here?" Father rested his chin in his hands. "It might make a bit more sense for him if you do."

 

Sleepy Ash leaned forward, resting his chin on the top of his head and sighed. "Sleepy Ash, the Servamp of Sloth."

 

"Old Child of Pride," came the next response, and the quietest one whispered out "Doubt Doubt of Envy." That left the sister and she gave him half a salute. "Servamp of Wrath, and also known as the Mother."

 

He turned his gaze upward, to where Sleepy Ash was resting on him comfortably, putting minimal effort into keeping him pinned, but still succeeding. "I think I can… see that," he said after a long moment, his mouth turned upward in a faint smile. _Living up to his name…_

 

"For just Sleepy Ash or for all of us?" she asked, amused. "There's more to it than just what we seem to be, but…" she gave a graceful shrug. "There are only four of us servamps, but there are other vampires out there."

 

"Mostly our subclass, so we stay as close as possible to make sure there is no undue trouble," Pride sniffed. "Not that they would dare try and disobey our orders to not cause mischief." He looked very sure of himself. "At least you'll have a contact in this town other than our young actor here, even if he will be a little more limited."

 

He fidgeted more and couldn't look at any of them. They were telling him so much and the acid seem to rise in his throat, choking off any words of questions. He didn't think they were going to kill him and he wasn't dying…unless they made it that way, so he couldn't become a vampire….

 

His thoughts were cut off abruptly when their father spoke. "We want you to become part of the family."

 

He stared at him, certain that he was hearing things. Why would they want him to actually…not just… "What do you mean?" he asked cautiously, tensing to run, Sleepy Ash keeping him in his place or no. He'd find a way to get out if things went south.

 

"He wants to turn you into a monster like us," Envy's expression was hard to read, but the words sounded frighteningly sincere.

 

"Now, don't sweeten the words at all, Envy. Do you really think of yourself as a monster?" Father laughed up at him and patted his hand and Envy relaxed and sighed, before slumping in his seat. "We're all still family and that ties us together. Have I asked you to do anything that would make you a monster?"

 

"No," he admitted lowly, "but that doesn't make us any less of one." He looked over at him. "Don't decide tonight," he said quietly. "Think about it."

 

"I… what's involved?" he asked cautiously. It still hadn't really hit him yet; he felt like he was dreaming up one of his plays, something so surreal and ridiculous that it didn't make sense at all. Who would believe human-created vampires? Who would believe in vampires at all?

 

"You have to die," came the blithe response and he blanched, wrenching backwards with enough strength that it threw off Sleepy Ash for a moment. Their father laughed at his reaction, even though he tried to cover it up right after. "It wouldn't be for long," he tried to reassure him. "Do any of my children look dead?"

 

"The ones that survived," Sleepy Ash whispered, very, very quietly and only because he was so close, did he hear him. He shivered a little and felt that sick feeling sink back into his stomach.

 

"There is a lot that goes into it," father continued, "but I have had a lot of success and I know that it would work out just fine with us. My children are much stronger, can go further and farther than any human ever could—you could do so _much_."

 

"Don't forget to mention the contract," Pride commented. "What is one of the things that makes us unique above even the common vampire that our father got his inspiration from." He leaned forward and again looked less like a child and more like a serious old man. "You saw the young girl in the hotel near our old lodgings, yes?" he asked. When he nodded, Pride continued. "That young girl is my _Eve_ , someone that I have contracted to and share a bond with."

 

He blinked and stared at him, trying to process the words. "Contract….bond…?" he was feeling almost light-headed; it was all too much to process at once.

 

"Yes; with humans," Pride's voice was earnest. "We drink only blood from them and we feed off of their willpower. Humans, even if they have short lives, are filled with incredible desires and dreams. We find those humans that speak to our natures."

 

"Don't you remember being human?" he found himself asking. "You talk like you never were… like humans…" _And that includes me, I must be really stupid looking to them_ , "You act like humans are completely different."

 

There was a moment of silence that stretched for far too long, making him even more twitchy.

 

"Pride was the second one to be chosen," Wrath said finally. "He's been a Servamp almost as long as Sleepy Ash, don't let his appearance fool you."

 

"He never acted like a child," he muttered. "I figured something was weird with him, but I wasn't about to ask. So.. I mean—you're really… you're really not human?" he asked. "But you use us… for what?"

 

"Not you, obviously," he sniffed. "You have desire and wishes and insight, but it would be wasted on just being an _Eve_. This way, you have a long life to achieve your dreams. You could work on the stage for years on end, you could learn of stories all over the world—your human life would be too short and limited to achieve those dreams."

 

"…what else does this… Eve… do?" So Envy _had_ said "his Eve" and it wasn't a name after all… and he hadn't picked up on it.

 

"They give us a name," Sleepy Ash sighed. "We make a pact with them and it happens because of a name and a gift. Father… worked out all the twists with it." He twisted his head up to see the faint expression of distaste. "People would call it magic, but he calls it _science_."

 

"Maybe a little of both," Father allowed. "Still, there were a lot of experiments that were done before I achieved the result I did with you, Sleepy Ash."

 

"I remember," Sleepy Ash said lowly. "I watched for years as you tried over and over again to make your plans work out." He felt the shiver and wondered just what had gone on, what sort of experiments had to be done to create vampires out of ordinary people, vampires that said they couldn't die and who needed human beings to have a solid name.

 

"Now, that is how science works. There are successes and failures along the road to making something truly unique and fantastic in the world." He seemed unconcerned at the implications that he was talking about human life here and he was certain that with only four … servamps and a lot of people along the way, there was a lot of death, too.

 

He had heard enough for one night. Anything more would surely tip him right over the edge and then nobody but the crazy houses would want him. He stood up shakily, Sleepy Ash leaning back a little to let him, but he was aware of all eyes on him.

 

He opened his mouth and his voice came out in a squeak at first and he cleared his throat, not missing the amused glance of Wrath and her whispered 'hedgehog'. He tried again, feeling his face warm. "I think I need to… sleep on this," he muttered. "It's a lot to …to try and think about."

 

"It can be," their father agreed and stood up as well, a hand on his shoulder. "Do you feel comfortable enough staying here tonight or do you want to think about this somewhere else?' We always have your room available," he pointed out.

 

"…you have noticed some people have objected to our presence here," Sleepy Ash pointed out. "Nothing that they can prove, but…" he shrugged. "Some people have long memories and this isn't the first time we were in this area."

 

"So that's why you're going to travel," he said slowly. "So that you can come back after people have forgotten?" His brain tried again to understand all of what was being said, but the idea that this family was older than they looked, had been around for … not even years, but longer than that, was staggering. They seemed so warm and real and nothing like the cruel stories of vampires he had read.

 

"Mhmm… there is a lot in the world to discover still," Father agreed and watched him carefully. "I promise I won't be performing any experiments on you tonight; it's safe to stay here. You do still trust us, right?"

 

He gave a jerky nod, he didn't think they would do anything to hurt him, he just needed to close his eyes and try and understand everything. "Yeah… I just—I think I need to lay down." He rubbed a hand over his face, trembling a little. Wrath took his arm and gave him a reassuring smile.

 

"Come on, then. I'll make sure you don't fall down along the way, hedgehog. I don’t think I trust you outside tonight. You…. you aren't really able to think properly." She scowled at Pride, who just shrugged. "We can talk more in the morning, after you've had time to think it through."

 

He hoped that when he woke up, it would have all been a part of some odd dream he had and that they'd tease him about him being so gullible as to fall for their stories, but some part of him knew that wasn't going to happen.

 

~

 

"Did you see how he looked?" Sleepy Ash shook his head, slumping into the spot he had occupied before. "He could barely talk, too. Are you sure this is the right thing to do?" He was rather fond of the odd little actor, the one that had been dubbed a hedgehog by his sister and would most likely be living with that for the rest of his life.

 

If he chose to go through with it with all that was left unsaid.

 

"Now, really—it's a lot to take in, but he's a clever boy and I'm sure after a good night's sleep, he'll be more accepting in the morning." Father sounded entirely too confident, but Sleepy Ash was uncertain. It was one thing to become part of a family, but it was quite another to be told you would have to die for it.

 

Still, a selfish part of him wanted it to work out to have the hedgehog actor come willingly and the other part was more pragmatic—he didn't want to see the boy lost in one of his father's less favorable experiments.

 

~

 

He didn't get any rest that night; every time he closed his eyes, his imagination supplied him with images of pale, cold bodies laying in odd configurations on the floor, or of him covered in blood and _enjoying_ it, of fighting with blades and magic and chains. Every time he tried to tell himself it  wasn't real, the shadows seemed to come to life to mock him, to drag him down and let him see what other horrors lay beyond the light.

 

Of hands pinning him down, of dark smiles and his soul trying to escape from his body… he shuddered and shot up in bed. It was barely daylight, but he wasn't going to try and sleep again. He looked towards the door, half-expecting to see someone there, but it was firmly shut and no one in sight. He had to get out of her for the moment, he had to clear his head…

 

It was a lucky thing, for his room to be on the ground floor. He slipped out the window, only thinking of trying not to disturb the family. He could always come back once the fresh air cleared his head. It would all make sense; he just needed… time.

 

~

 

It wasn't much better on the streets; the whispers were a little louder, but he ignored them. He didn't need to hear what others were going to say about the family. He did notice that not as many people came to his show and those that did watched him with an almost startling intensity. He lost heart for it after a few short moments of storytelling and retreated to his old nook.

 

He rested in the sunny corner, eyes half closed as he struggled to stay awake and reconcile all of what he had seen and had been told. He felt guilty for running away; here in the warmth of the sun and the chatter of everyone around him, it seemed rather silly.

 

And even if the were…. _I don't think I actually mind…_

 

A soft meowing caught his attention and he saw the small black cat that was normally with the family at his side again and he smiled. "So I see that they sent you to check up on me.  I guess it did look bad, me running off and all…"

 

The cat crawled into his lap and he laughed a little, making himself more comfortable. "I don't think it's … as bad as I dreamed it would be," he said, voice quiet. "I had all sorts of bad dreams last night, but…I mean—Pride was right. There isn't much for me here and—" he swallowed hard. "I love everyone in that family. I don't want to lose them. It's the first time… the first time someone's wanted me, too, you know?" he kept his stroking gentle, trying to calm  himself as he explained his reasoning to a small creature that didn't understand.

 

The cat meowed as if he _did_ understand and he pushed away the thought; vampires were one thing, as ridiculous as it was, talking animals were another.

 

"I … I want to go to them, but—it's hard, too," he whispered, biting at his lip. "What if it doesn't work? What if there's a mistake?" He noticed more people staring at him as they walked by and he grimaced. "And … and I think they're in danger, too," he admitted. "Maybe they oughta leave while they have a chance. I don't want them to get in trouble because I couldn't make up my mind."

 

The cat gave him a look like 'so you're going to get yourself in trouble instead, stupid?' and he laughed. "I can hide easier and once they see I don't go poof in the sunlight, they'll back off. I'm just one more weird storyteller in this town, just another street kid." His smile trembled at the edges. "You'll tell them, hm?" he asked. "I'm trusting you, kitty," he said, mock sternly.

 

The cat simply meowed again and made himself more comfortable in his lap, before falling asleep.

 

~

 

He had fallen asleep as well and it was only by some miracle that he hadn't been robbed or beaten up when he had been so defenseless. The cat was already done, which was no surprise and twilight was starting to creep into the streets.

 

He started to walk toward the house; it had been normal for him, but would they want him there after he had run away? _You're not a coward. Do you think that they'll turn you away? If they do, then that's all it is and you managed to have a unique experience in life…_ It was just so hard to move; to make his way and part of him still hoped it had been an odd joke. He liked stories and maybe they had told him a good one.

 

He was almost there when someone stopped him, looking uncomfortable and uncertain. "Are you the hedgehog?" he asked, fully in the dark shadows of the buildings, shaking a little.

 

"… Wrath isn't going to get over that name," he muttered, but he nodded. Wait… this was the guy that had been… he felt the blood drain from his face and he had to force himself to not take a step back. He was certain it was the same person, but there was no sign of his injury at all. The person who was now a _vampire._

 

"She said you didn't have one, but that you'd answer to hedgehog," he smiled brightly. "They wanted me to give this to you," he said, pressing the envelope into his hands. "And that they're sorry they didn't say goodbye."

 

"….goodbye?" Any sort of uncertainty and nervousness left. "They… they're gone?" his voice rose and broke at the end and he stared past the man as if it would change the answer and he'd see one of the family coming to get him. They left without even…

 

He opened up the note and quickly scanned it, then read it once more as he tried to knock out the disbelief.

 

_Young actor…_ That much alone told him who wrote or dictated the letter

 

_As you can see, we have departed this town. Your running off is somewhat understandable, but ill-timed at the best. Still, with you still in this town and not showing any weaknesses that they think vampires have, you will fall into the somewhat comfortable life you had before, if you so wish. Tell our story, they will think it nothing more than one of your fantastic stage plays_

_However, if you so wish to be a part of this family, you simply have to find us. I am certain that such a clever young man as yourself can find a way to do so, but we have advised you and the advice still stands—think on this matter, when we are away. We do not wish undue influence on this subject and Sleepy Ash is most insistent that you truly think about this life that we live, as it is not something that all would be able to handle._

_If my words mean anything, I truly wish to see what time can make of you, young actor. I think that you fit into our family with an ease that was astounding and if I may be so bold, I believe fate had a hand in our crossing of paths._

There was no signature, no clues or hints as to where they had gone and he felt a little dizzy with it all. "They really left?" he asked, staring up at the man, who was clearly waiting for a response.

 

"They got your message," he shrugged. "I don't understand it, but they noticed some problems, too." He winced and rubbed the back of his head. "Probably it was my… um… dying, I guess that pushed it along." He looked a little uncomfortable. "She promised I could live mostly a normal life, as long as I didn't go out into the sun. Right now… I think I just have to get used to the changes…" He looked up at him hopefully. "Can I come with you if you find them?"

 

"I… I don't know how to…" he wanted to say _keep out of the sunlight_ , but he had been doing it for months now. "I'm not part of the family yet," he said instead, staring at the worn tops of his shoes. "I'm just…myself."

 

"… well, I know you'll chose what you think is best, but—" he hesitated. "It's not as bad as your stories say," he said after a moment. "Even after a night, I can say that." He waved a hand in farewell. "You take care, hedgehog."

 

It had to be a trick of the fading light, but when he blinked, the man was gone.

 

He stared down at the paper in his hands and made a face. "Find you, huh?" he asked, scowling slightly. "We'll see how well that turns out."

 

~

 

He tried to do as they asked—to try and go back to his life; to pretend like nothing strange had ever happened. He missed them, though—not just the warm space and the food, but the family itself. Of Sleepy Ash falling into a doze on his shoulders, or his sister lecturing him about wearing clothing that actually fit and not falling apart… of the speeches Pride made or the quiet conversations that Envy would have with him, late at night, when everyone else was sleeping.

 

And…the stares hadn't lessened up, either. It may have been partially because he found it odd to be in direct sunlight anymore and he stuck to the shade if he forgot to think about where he was. Any of his performances were done in the brightest light, though, as if he were shining it purposely on himself to grab the most attention.

 

People would come to see him, watching and following him and it was a struggle now; not so many coins or food and it was only because he had a key to the house that he had a safe place to rest, but everything echoed inside. Whether it was just his footsteps or him speaking to himself, it simply wasn't right or the same and he found himself planning on how to finally leave the home he had his entire life.

 

He laughed to himself as he thought about which way to go and what he needed to do. He hadn't needed very long at all to decide about where to set himself on his road of life. Now…it was just making sure he took the right path.

 

~

 

It didn't take as long as it could have, but he was still irritated, tired and cranky when he finally found them, in a much smaller space and waiting for him.

 

"I went the wrong way at first," he snapped. "I had to double back through down and go the opposite way." He crossed his arms over his chest. "And you move really fast for people that can't be in the sun," he muttered. "I didn't think I had to go as fast as I did to catch up with you. You could have left directions if you wanted me to be with you guys," he complained.

 

"But think of  how much you expanded your horizons!" Pride said happily, patting him on the arm. "You traveled a small section of the world and moved past your small home stage. How does it feel to finally do something new and exciting?"

 

He could only stare at him, somewhat awed at how managed to turn around his hardships so quickly. Father interfered before he got too far.

 

"Are you sure?" he asked, expression intent. "You found us and left on your own. Does that mean you want to become part of this family? There is no going back once I start."

 

He felt his stomach twist with nerves, hands clammy. He nodded slowly. "Yeah—I thought about it for awhile, ever since you guys told me about … what you were," it was still a little difficult getting the words out. Saying _vampire_ out loud still seemed faintly ridiculous, but after spending time with Joshua, Wrath's created vampire, it was a little easier.

 

"And you still want to lose your human life?" Sleepy Ash focused on just him. "You have a choice still."

 

He grinned wide and struck a pose, every moment flamboyant and over exaggerated. "Where else would I be able to end up?" He laughed. "A family of vampires suits me more than just hiding from people and doing a few shows here and there." He let his grin fall away to show how serious he was. "And… you are my family," he kicked at the ground, a blush heating up his cheeks. "I think from the beginning…"

 

"Mm… and the fact that your family was never human…" Father laughed and rested a hand on his shoulder, expression deadly serious. "It will hurt and while I am almost certain that there will be no problems, I cannot absolutely promise it. Are _you_ certain of your choice?"

 

He gave another nod and Father rested a hand behind his back, looking toward his other children, who were silent and intent. They knew what was going to happen. "Then let's begin."

 

 


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a bit... darker than the other ones, just as a warning-- bit of blood and such, but still kinda tame compared to the series itself. <3

It wasn't as dark as he thought it would be in the windowless room; there were lanterns interspersed around the room, but a great deal of the ambient light came from large glass jars, filled with what looked to be sparkling white powder. He took a step closer, curious and then nearly shrieked as he fell backwards when a face and hands slammed on the inside of the jar, before fading away again.

 

"W..wha… ?" he stared again, but it was simply glowing white powder again and he tried to get his heart working properly again after the jolt it was given. "A magic trick?"

 

The father looked back at where his attention had gone to and shook his head. "No, those are the Jin. It's part of what will make you one of my children." He tapped on a jar and gave a fond smile. "It's amazing what the remnants of souls can turn into and what they can power…"

 

He felt the blood drain from his face and he looked around at all the jars. "… " he opened his mouth and he couldn't think of a response to that. _You're going to use souls? How is that going to work? Souls are… they can’t…._

There must have been some sort of hint of the conflict in his stance, because father rested a hand on his shoulder. "They were once bad vampires that my children took care of," he said simply. "When a vampire dies, this is what comes of them." He gave him an earnest look. "Isn't it amazing that we discovered such a thing?" he asked. "If we just left them drifting about, who knows what could happen to them and people?"

 

He nodded slowly, unsure of what he meant by that, but he wasn't curious enough to press any further at the moment. His attention was caught by the long, slim table set up in the corner, a number of odd tools collected on a small table and he felt his heart lodge in his throat.

 

The father was still behind him and now there was nowhere to run. He straightened up and tried to put on the bravest face he had; he wasn’t going to be a coward about the choice he made. "Just have a seat," Father gave him a reassuring smile, but there was something about his expression that deeply unsettled him.

 

He didn't have time to run before the knife rammed home in his chest. He could vaguely hear the father speaking, but he couldn't speak, his voice came out in a pained squeak and he tried to reach up to tug out the knife, blood dripping down and staining his clothes.

 

"You have to be as close to death as possible for it to work," Father said absently, giving him a critical once-over and then pulling back with a satisfied nod. "At least I have everything ready—it won't be so long, I promise."

 

His hands fell to his sides and he closed his eyes, everything going from red-hot pain to something more numbing. He knew enough that was a bad sign that he didn't feel any pain at the moment. Everything felt odd and fuzzy and he tried to focus on the figure in front of him. It was the only clear thing in the room, other than the jars of white powder. He couldn't even see his fingers and when he tried to spread them out in front of him, there wasn't anything there to actually _move_. He had a disconnected thought of how he should be bothered by that, but… there was nothing at the moment.

 

"Shh, don't worry," the figure moved in front of him again, carrying one of the jars and carefully opened it, holding formless figures of screaming white in his hands, before shoving the whole mass at him, engulfing him and overwhelming him.

 

_No… don't do this—I wasn't a bad person—I just wanted to live… stop …!! Please let me go—I just…._ He couldn't jerk away from the voices and they filled his entire being, stretching out his senses until he could almost sense something of an arm or a leg—but then it was gone again and another white mass was filling his breath, his mind and he didn't have a mouth to scream.

 

_Find them… find more—bring them here—we can always use more… more more more….fresh and full of life and for us…._ He found enough of himself to form hands to cover his ears, but it didn’t shut out the malicious, cold words that slid through his mind, before they faded too and created more of himself. He could see the shadows now, like dark pools of ink, wrapping around him, glittering with the white threads that had been the things trapped in the jar.

 

"You're doing just fine," came the voice again and he opened his eyes and focused on him, the _father_ , his father—he almost sobbed and looked up at him pleadingly. He felt like he was melting away, condensing into some form of himself that he didn't know could exist inside of himself. "Not much longer now. I want to see what you do with the shadows given to your care."

 

Everything seemed to reach up and engulf him at once, with a roar that he only heard in his mind and as the darkness swallowed him whole, he found that he was able to scream, after all.

 

~

 

Sleepy Ash grimaced, looking down at the table and hands clenching in the fabric of his coat. "Again…" he whispered. "Why can't there be another way?"

 

Wrath patted his shoulder, staring off at the doorway, her expression full of cool anger. "It hasn't been that long since I was changed. I remember it...vaguely," she shivered a little. "You all though. You _heard_ the process before."

 

"Three times," Sleepy Ash agreed. "My own change doesn't count, it was…" he wrapped his arms around himself. It was such a hard, painful price to pay to be one of Father's children. As much as they had encouraged him, it was to make him feel welcome, to make him a part of something caring and warm before the darkness literally remade him. He had seen all the failures before his 'success', knew the path that had led them here, knew more than he wanted to of what powered the magic that had changed them all so drastically.

 

"Now we wait," Pride was solemn as well, nothing of posturing or speeches. This was a solemn occasion and while he had utmost faith that this would succeed, it was also not a time to make speculations or to squash the worries of others.

 

It wasn't long before the first scream echoed through the house and Sleepy Ash was grateful that this particular 'home' of theirs was isolated enough so that they didn't have neighbors investigating the noises. _We couldn't have ever turned him in the town he came from, as much as Father wanted to. They would have burned the place down around us and while it wouldn't have killed us, it would have been really damn annoying._

Everyone flinched as the scream was abruptly cut off and the silence seemed heavier for a moment. "I wonder what his powers will be," Wrath said, voice shaking a little as she tried to stay calm and not knock down the door to go to him. It was already started, nothing could stop the process now. "He's such a dramatic person…"

 

"He'll have the shadows, no matter what," Sleepy Ash murmured. No one could command shadow like him, but they were all reformed from shadow and memory and blood. "What he can do with them…" he shrugged and yawned. He wondered more what sin would be forced upon his nature and how much he would fight it. It was too bothersome to fight his and too annoying to admit that was the problem.

 

"I say that father gives that boy the stage," Pride interjected. "If he goes with something that the child is more naturally inclined to feel comfortable with, then his power can only grow from there. He will not flee from it and cause problems; he can only feel comfort from it and thrive."

 

"You expect him to carry around a stage with him?" Wrath demanded. "Or is he simply to form one from the shadows?"

 

"His secret place," Envy murmured, peering out from his corner, watching them all. "He can have his stage there…"

 

"But bring it out like we do our own powers," Wrath agreed, frowning deeper and tapping her fingers against the table and tensing when another choked scream emerged from behind the door. There was another period of silence and then the shadows started to creep from underneath the door, reaching out with shapes like hands.

 

Sleepy Ash sighed and got up, standing in front of them silently. Only a slight tensing of his body gave away that he was doing anything at all and the shadows crept back underneath, back to consume their almost-brother. "What a pain," he whispered, going back to his seat, but changing back to his cat form and laying over Wrath's hands. She only laughed and stroked over his fur.

 

"Easier to deal?" she asked, poking his stomach. "You can't stay like that all day, Sleepy Ash…." She understood his need to retreat; he had already seen so many failures and all of them hoped that this boy wouldn't be one of them.

 

"I can if I want to," he muttered, looking up at her. "The shadows are already remaking him. We just have to wait until Father says he's ready." Or until Father came out, all apologies and regret that he didn't make it.

 

She flicked his ear, scowling slightly. "Well, at least you're easier to deal with this way," she muttered. "But if Father needs you to control what he's created…" she let her voice trail off. He could walk into any shadow and command it and until their newest member embraced the shadows that would define him, Sleepy Ash could commander them and make them obey.

 

"So they don't devourer us all?" he flicked his tail back and forth and sighed. He had to take care of that situation before, the victims of their father's previous experiments that had been unable to form their indentifies when their humanity had been stripped away. It was one of the reasons there were so few of them.

 

"That would be ideal," Pride interjected, making a face. "I would rather not have this house consumed by the remnants of souls looking to take revenge on us all." He looked thoughtful. "Not that I think there will be any problem. He has survived this long in life and has a rich imagination and strong will. He will bend the shadows to him before long."

 

"He wants it," Envy added. "Wants it more than anything—" he understood that need; he saw what others had and wished for it, but he never actively went after it himself. "He will make it through."

 

Pride nodded in agreement. "From what we've seen of him, it does not seem as if it will be a problem. The hardest will be creating his space inside himself and escaping from it."

 

Every one of them flinched at that; their inward power was a force of its own, complete with their own demons to hold them in check or tempt them over the edge. A landscape that they had access to and tugged them in at times when they were caught off-guard, a power that become always became influenced by the passing years and the Eves they collected.

 

It was all too easy to become trapped at the beginning, it was another way others were lost, until there was nothing left by scraps of shadow. Not that Father didn't use _those_ as well, condensing it in a way that even Sleepy Ash couldn't understand.

 

Pride cleared his throat. "I… I must go and see to my Eve, at least to check up on her well being before time stretches too long," he said. "I will be back before too long; it would not do for any of us to be absent when he comes around."

 

Sleepy Ash sighed softly. "If any of you are called away, I'll still be here to greet him." There was a look of almost amusement in his eyes. "I think I should stay like this for it. What do you think?"

 

"But we haven't told him about the animals… yet…" Wrath's voice trailed off and then she started to laugh, shaking her head at her brother. "You are a devious person, Sleepy Ash," she allowed. "Who knew you had such a hidden humor to you?"

 

He gave her a lazy smile and his voice was almost too innocent in his words. "It's less troublesome to get it over with no trouble and explaining is such a pain." He closed his eyes and looked as if he was already taking a nap.

 

"Tch, you'll never change," she murmured, but she ran the tips of her fingers over his back, sparing a glance to the door. There was no more sound at the moment, but that could mean several possibilities. Either he had not survived the near-death experience or he was already mired deep in his very being, shaping the core of himself.

 

~

 

Everything was dark, but there was no pain—it was just an empty void. A voice intruded into his mind and he flinched and looked around, but no one was there and he rested a hand against his chest, where he could feel the echo of the knife still there.

 

"I will give you your name, but you have to make yourself from this point on. Prove to me that you are worth of the name."

 

He looked around again, but it was still the quiet void, but at his feet, there was a soft light. "What's the name?" he asked cautiously.

 

"All my children have the names of sins—you shall be The One and Only, Lawless of Greed." There was a note of pride in the man's voice, certain of the outcome that would come of this whole trial, sure of the results that such a name would bring.

 

"Lawless?" he tried out the name, almost seeing the words shine out and surround him and he smiled a little, realizing he could make that happen here; he could have his name be visible. It was _his_ and that gave him power.

 

"Now—make your world your own and then escape." The presence was suddenly gone and he was left alone in the dark, with only his name to light the way. He spun around on one foot, considering just what he could do. This was _his_ stage.

 

As if conjured by his thought, a wide open space opened up, supported with rickety seats and a wide stage, candles and lanterns lighting the venue. His grin widened and the moments before seemed to fade away for the moment as he took steps towards his creation. "All the world's a stage," he murmured. "Who needs a whole world when I can create what I want on this one?"

 

"Who says that you get to create it?" A figure stepped out from the shadows and he recoiled for a moment, squinting at the image of himself that was mocking him.

 

"Eh?" He spread his arms. "It's mine—this is mine—and I can do whatever I want on this space." His scarf was back and trailed behind him and he loved the movement of it, could imagine a crowd of people below him, instead of the handful that usually came to his performances.

 

"It's my space, too—" the not-him smirked and there were dark shadows around him, splitting off from him and forming again. "What if I want you gone and I can take over completely?"

 

"Not going to happen," he snapped. "This is my place—my stage and my rules," he stood a step forward, the shadows moving around _him_ now and he knew he could pull what he needed from them in order to win his space. His scarf felt like a living creature, a mobile piece of shadow and he reached inside and felt a rapier drop into his hands. He couldn't see the smile that stretched across his face, but he felt the need to dominate over this imposter self of him rise.

"Who are you though, Lawless of Greed?" his other self stepped closer and red eyes gleamed in the dark, the candles snuffing around him as he walked around the stage. "Are you a weak human, the scraps that were found on the street?" Another candle was snuffed in his presence. "Are you an experiment, ready to be reused for other parts?"

 

Lawless—he _would_ claim that name, it was his and it made him stronger than the nameless figure in front of him. "I'm Lawless," he snapped. "A member of the family—a …" He struggled for a moment. Was he a vampire yet? What was he, except himself on a lonely stage, waiting for the next cue. He pointed the sword at the imposter. "Who are you?"

 

"I'm the truth of what you are," the figure held a lantern casually, swinging it in intense motions and letting the oil slosh around and splatter the stage. "You are formed from malice and shadow—inside you lurks the demons of those that were slain before… and want to take back the lives _they_ once had. How are you more deserving of it?"

 

"They died, didn't they?" Lawless returned, feeling almost cold inside as he stepped closer to what could be a conflagration. "They weren't strong enough and I will be strong enough to fight them all—they're _me_ now."  He reached out without warning and grabbed the imposters wrist. "You say you're me, but what part of that are you claiming?"

 

"The one that will kill without mercy," its eyes were cold. "The demon that is the true part of being a vampire. You can't kill me, just like you can't be killed with normal means—" he laughed and sprang back, as graceful as Lawless was with his movements. "Chain yourself and you expose your true weakness. Then we'll drag you down—make you another piece of the shadows that remade you."

 

The shadows reached up without warning and grabbed Lawless' wrists, pinning him to the spot, while the demon-part of him lurked closer. "Are you truly strong enough, Lawless?" he whispered. "Strong enough to fight the shadows?"

 

Lawless growled, baring his teeth and swinging out with the edge of his sword and cutting down the shadows that held him, before stabbing the demon of him in the heart, much as he had been stabbed when Father started to remake him.

 

"I am the Servamp of Greed and I will take what I want and I will be the one that wins this round," he hissed." He shoved at the body, who simply laughed and dissolved into smoke.

 

"You are still a vampire," he laughed. "A servant to humans, but chained for the need to grab a name and blood and to survive. You can never escape, _Lawless_." He faded from sight, but it wasn't the only shadow that taunted him. The voices from the corners of the room, from the seats in the balconies he had created, all whispered to him, taunting him and telling him their stories. They would be the ones that would always be there.

 

Lawless looked down at the stage and the shadows and gave a low, mocking bow. It was time to remake himself entirely. The shadows wouldn't touch him where he was going—not these ones, at the very least. He dropped the lantern that had been held by his other half, engulfing the stage and all the seats in flame.

 

~

 

He opened his eyes with a start, wondering where the fire and shadows and voices were, and realized that he was in a bright, sunny room and everything… everything felt strange. He blinked and turned around, but the room was completely empty and the windows were up high. He heard a meow and he turned around to see the family's black cat across from him, but … was he always that big? Was he on the floor for some reason.

 

He made an odd squeaking noise, then an even louder one at the sound that he made.  The cat didn't even flinch, just gave him an amused stare. "Meow." It didn't even sound like a cat's meow, in fact… it sounded like a human and it… he stared and tried to make sense of it.

 

"…Sleepy Ash?" He reached out and then stared at the small paws that filled his vision and he yelped, tumbling over backwards and then crying out in pain as the quills that adorned his back brushed against his eyes in his panic. "Wh.. wha…."

 

A sigh and the cat nudged him gently, putting his paws around him. "Calm down, Lawless," he sighed, using his new name. "Father wanted this portion to be a surprise." The amusement was obvious in his voice and Lawless found himself bristling, before Sleepy Ash smacked his much-smaller nose. "Do you remember that comment our sister made about you being a hedgehog?"

 

Lawless nodded slowly, stretching out his paws and trying to get used to the new shape and then rolled over, amused at how different this body was.  He was very conscious of himself, but this body as well. After all the surprises of before, this was almost a good one; it didn't hurt and there were no shadows clinging to him. He was a _hedgehog_ and part of him felt like he should be insulted, but couldn't find it in him to be.

 

"That's one thing that happens to us in the sunlight. We turn into the animal that father chose for us." Sleepy Ash took a few steps to the side, outside of the bright, sunny patch and with a shift in the air, he changed back to the sleepy boy that Lawless was familiar with and reached out to grab him and drag him into the shade.

 

With a gasp of pain, Lawless sprawled out on the floor, panting and staring up at his brother. "Any more surprises?" He tentatively put a hand in the sun, but nothing happened. "I mean—that's just _strange_." He shook his head.

 

"Our father has a odd sense of humor," he said dryly. He noticed what Lawless was doing. "It has to be direct sunlight," he offered. "If it's shady or you're just in it a little bit, it won't change you. You can go outdoors, like you've seen us, but you have to stay out of the direct sun or else you'll change into your animal form." He gave him a faint smile. "Now you see how we managed to vanish from your sight so quickly."

 

Lawless nodded and shivered a little as the shadows in the corner caught his attention and he edged closer to the sunlight. Animal form or not…

 

"You can also change into it when you want to," Sleepy Ash continued. "Just in the sunlight, you're restricted to the animal form." He stood up slowly and held out a hand to Lawless. He seemed to sense his unease with the shadows and true, with his presence, they seemed to retreat for a moment. "Let's go to the rest of the family. They'll be glad to see you survived."

 

Lawless nodded and got to his feet unsteadily, feeling as if his entire world had been shifted off its foundations and his body felt like he was in the one of the imposter he had killed. He wondered who had been killed and who actually survived.

 

 


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lawless starts to get used to the darkness that lays within

Lawless was uncertain all over again when Sleepy Ash led him out the door. He was supposed to be a part of this family now, but what if he had done something wrong? He had escaped from the darkness that changed him by setting everything on fire. _Was that considered cheating?_  

They were there, waiting and watching him and he felt a little self-conscious at their intense looks. He took a step backward, but Sleepy Ash gave him a shove and he stumbled forward. He shot his _brother_ an irritated look, barely muffling the irritated squeak that wanted to come out. Apparently, some of the hedgehog nature still lingered. 

"You survived," Pride leaned forward on the table, a smile on his lips, broad and proud and he pointed to the seat next to him. "Not that I had any doubt in your abilities, but there are situations where even I am off in my predictions." As Lawless sat down, Sleepy Ash slumping next to him and leaning heavily against his side, he continued. "The marks of the change are on you in an obvious fashion… you best be careful when you go out." 

"Not that we can let him leave for awhile," Sleepy Ash yawned. "Too much to teach him…such a pain." Lawless knew it wasn't directed at him specifically, but he still bristled a little. 

"Why can't I leave?" he demanded, hunching down in the ragged clothing he still wore; changing into a vampire or not, he still wore the same clothing that he technically 'died' in. He pressed a hand against the front of his shirt; there was no blood or any signs that he had been stabbed and he wondered if he had dreamed that. Surely their father wouldn't have… 

"Do you want to?" Wrath asked him, frowning down at him and her stare was more intense than all the other's combined. "Or are you just… prickly?" An amused grin lightened the scowl and she reached out and tugged the ends of his hair. "I didn't think you took to being a hedgehog _this_ well." Her gaze flicked over to Sleepy Ash's. "Did he really turn into one?" 

His tiny smile gave the answer. "Yep. Father chose him as a hedgehog… works out well for him, don't you think?" He turned his gaze over to Lawless. "You could show them if you'd like--  " He yawned and stretched, turning into the cat again. "Just as easy as that once you get used to it." He didn't even break stride with his conversation and Lawless blinked, trying to reconcile the two forms. Even though he had seen him change before, it was a little startling. 

"But… there isn't sunlight?" he asked, confused and looking down at Sleepy Ash, who looked content in either form. "I thought…" He felt a momentary pang that he wouldn't ever be able to enjoy full sunlight again. He wasn't anything like a cat, but he did enjoy the warmth of it. Even if he had gotten used to staying in the shadows, that had been more of a choice. 

"The sunlight makes it automatic," Wrath explained, poking at Sleepy Ash's stomach and earning an annoyed glare. "But you can change into your form whenever you'd like otherwise." There was still that playful smirk on her face. "But at least you know about all the animals in the house now. Can you guess who is which?" 

He looked up at her and grinned widely. "That's easy," he said, poking Sleepy Ash, before changing it into an absent-minded pet. "You're the wolf, Envy is the snake, our sleepy brother is most obviously the cat…" He looked over at Pride, who was smirking at him. "And you're obviously the bat," he said dryly. "What else could you be?" 

Pride laughed and with one breath and the next, he had changed and the bat landed on his shoulder. "I am the most vampire of vampires!" His voice was high-pitched and amused and Lawless couldn't help but laugh at how _proud_ of himself that he sounded. "A bat is most fitting isn't it? The same way with all your stories." 

Lawless just shook his head, amused. "Are you sure we didn't pick our own forms?" he muttered. He'd be the first to admit he had hedgehogs on the brain and if they were going to be turned into animals in the first place… 

"Maybe," Sleepy Ash shrugged. "You do get used to it fast." He stretched out his paws, evidence in his very moments. 

Lawless tugged on his hair, trying to imagine getting so used to being a hedgehog that he could change into one without a thought; that he could stay in that form and let people pet him as Sleepy Ash seemed to enjoy the pets he got in his cat form. 

"Have you seen what you look like yet?" Wrath asked, leaning her head on one hand, watching him with a casual laziness. "It's not so strange that you feel like you have to hide, I'm sure." Her gaze momentarily went over to Envy, who stuck to the shadows, but his face wasn't overtly hidden for once. "You stand out more than before, that's for sure." 

He looked down at himself automatically, taking in his normal, ragged appearance. "I have?" he asked, surprised. He couldn't see any difference in himself; not even the clinging shadows that had been in the dreamscape were around. 

She sighed and dragged him to his feet. "You've seen yourself before, right?" she asked. "I know I caught you before, but have you really remembered?" She was taking him toward a large, spacious room and while there was light from a window giving the room a warm glow, she didn't pull him toward that, but to the full length mirror that was in the corner. 

"Give it a moment," she said, covering his eyes with one hand. "You're going to see something strange first." Her tone was darkly amused and he flinched a little and wondering if he would see anything at all or if it would just be an empty space. For a moment, the demon-half of him flashed behind his eyes, taunting smile and sword dripping with blood held at the ready. 

He swallowed hard and stared at the mirror, blinking in shock when he didn't see himself, but the hedgehog he had turned into. He took a step back, nearly tripping over his own feet and watched the hedgehog mirror his motions. "How… what… is this a joke?" he asked. 

She laughed and shook her head and he noticed the wolf instead of the girl and he felt a little dizzy. Something about the image in front of him triggered something in his brain and he found himself so much closer to the floor than before, staring up at _himself_ , but himself not as he had seen himself before. The figure crouching in front of him was just enough different that it sent a shiver down his spine. 

He blinked a little and stood closer, nose pressing up against the glass. in. "Wh… what?" he turned to the others. "Your hair doesn't look this weird!" he protested. "Why does my hair look different?" it was honestly the first thing that came to mind; not the red eyes or fangs, but the fact that the bangs of his hair mimicked the spines of his hedgehog form. 

"My hair is _blue_ ," Sleepy Ash commented from the doorway, already back in his human form and tugging on a strand. "No matter what your mind tricked you into believing you saw before. You don't win the strange game, but you win points for being the most like your animal in appearance." 

"How come I didn't see any of this before?" he demanded, turning around to face them and dimly aware that he was a hedgehog lecturing vampires.  "With all of you?" He turned back to the mirror and this time he noticed the shadows that clung around his form, seeping from his skin. The scarf he would have been wearing in his human form flickered and moved around him as if it were alive. 

"You didn't want to see," Wrath reached down a hand to hold him, carrying him away from the mirror. "Humans …" she shrugged "They see what they want to. Now—if one wanted to _see_ you as a vampire, they'd see it, but—people don't look that closely at anyone." 

"If they saw us in a mirror…" his voice trailed off, thinking about the stories and then pushing it away. There was truth and lies in everything and he was certain that their father had used enough of truth and pushed in his own versions out of a whim. 

"Then it's best you start avoiding mirrors like you have already started with the sunlight." They all turned at their father's voice. Lawless squeaked and tried to tuck himself under Wrath's hair, feeling absurdly scared for some reason and not knowing why. His father wouldn't even hurt him. That had been the demon that had done that… 

"Lawless—" Father held out his hand, looking pleased at the other form. "Come now, change back so we can talk face to face." It had the flavor of a command underneath it all and he changed without thinking about it, breathing deeply and a bit light-headed from the abrupt transition. "Now, how are you feeling?" 

He fidgeted, staring down at the floor. "Alive?" he asked weakly. "I don't know yet… I mean, I still feel like me, but…" he rubbed the back of his head, his gaze going toward the bit of the mirror that was still visible and flinching. "But I'm not exactly the me I was before…" 

"No." He led him away more firmly, closing the door behind him so that the mirror that was distracting him was hidden away again. "You're one of my precious children now, much stronger and more amazing than the human you were before, but you're still you as well at your core." He smiled brightly at him. "I'm so glad to have you with our family, Lawless. We won't ever leave you alone." 

He nodded and still twitched nervously. "They said… I can't leave?" His voice rose a little in the question and Father nodded absently. "Not that we want you to leave us so quickly, but there are a great many adjustments to make to being a servamp, you know. It isn't just like you can live your life as you did before." 

"There's the shadows," Envy whispered. "There are the changes and the need for blood." His eyes almost glowed in the darkness. "It only really goes away when you have your Eve and even then… you want _their_ blood." 

"But you don't need it," Sleepy Ash said, rolling his eyes. "We're not mindless animals, Lawless. We have our own wills, we don't need to be swung around by a human's desires, either." Despite his words, he hesitated over the last and Father laughed and rubbed over the top of his head. 

"But it's what I created you for, Sleepy Ash," he said casually. "So that you'd never be alone and you can always grow from others." 

Sleepy Ash snorted, but didn't pull away, simply looking sad. "Could have had that before all of this," he whispered. 

"Now, now—none of that. You're going to make Lawless feel as if he made the wrong choice." Father's voice was almost too bright and cheerful. 

"Not that I can't… go back and unmake the choice," Lawless said slowly, meeting everyone's eyes. "Didn't you say that?" he asked. "That there was no turning back from all of this?" He could feel the shadows creeping down his back again and he shivered a little. 

"Nothing can kill you now," Father said firmly. "You'll stay the way you are forever and making contracts with humans, before returning to your family." He rested his other hand in Lawless' hair. "I know it sounds overwhelming, but I promise you—this is a life that you will grow very fond of. You won't be able to understand any other." 

It could almost be a threat, but the tone was so kind that he found himself nodding. He was already in love with this family and he didn't mind the cost at all as long as he got to stay with them. He couldn't imagine wanting to do the _Eve_ thing, but he could come to that road when it appeared in front of him. 

He first had to reconcile being a _vampire_ first and what that entailed. He looked over at Sleepy Ash, hope in his voice. "You'll teach me what to do, right, big brother?" It was half a tease and half-real—it almost hurt, waiting for Sleepy Ash's response. He trusted him to take care of him. Not that he didn't trust the others, but Sleepy Ash was the oldest and Lawless had spent the most time with him. 

Sleepy Ash sighed and he rubbed at his eyes, pushing his father's hand off his head with the same motion. "Yeah, Lawless… I'll take care of you." 

~ 

He was back on the stage again, or the remains of it. He stepped carefully across fire-blackened wood and still smoking timbers, eyes glancing around for the demon he fought before. The room was echoingly empty and he jumped off the platform to wander into the stands, hands tense at his sides. 

"Lawless~" He spun around at his name and saw the shadows creeping up on stage, flickering in and out of focus, before vanishing like smoke. "Are you strong enough to face us again?" He turned again, his scarf nearly strangling him as it came alive, or as if some invisible hand had taken a hold of it and was yanking. 

He struck out with the sword that was in his hand, and when he felt it give against the invisible figure, he could breathe again. The sword came away dripping with blood and he felt his breath hitch as he looked at the liquid dripping down the blade. 

"Just like your father already… stabling people to get them to shut up." The voice mocked him. "How many people will you stab, will you kill—will you drain of blood? Will you even want to have an Eve, knowing that they'll die?" 

"I'm not going to kill humans!" He snapped at the voice, ignoring the little thrill that the one that taunted him spoke in a pained tone, little gasps in the middle of his words. "Father said we're supposed to protect them. That's why he created us." 

"Protect humans?" The voice laughed again and Lawless was getting tired of the slinking around and willed the place to be filled with light of all sort, shooing away the darkness. He still couldn't see the person who was taunting him. "You won't have a choice—you'll be chained to them for the rest of their lives, watching them outgrow you and resent you, before they turn to dust in your arms." 

Lawless swallowed hard at the imagery, the stage itself seemed to listen to the words as it played out the tragedy for all to see and the shadows were back again, even with the light in every corner. They reached out and the ones nearest to him snagged at his clothes, fingers plucking at the fabric and small hands wrapping around his ankles and holding him in place. Another set forced him to watch the stage. 

"This is what your life will be, Lawless. Never belonging except for a moment, never-ending watching humanity drift around you." 

"So?" Lawless tried to sound brave, even when the shadows crept over him more, pulling him apart until he felt like he was dissolving into bits of shadow himself, feeling the white smoke that had been shoved into his body start to creep out, choking his breath. "I'm not human anymore, it doesn't matter!" 

"But did you really have a choice?" the voice taunted. "You just jumped right in, so desperate to have a family that you really didn't think about the consequences of being stuck in the life you fell into. You thought _I_ was the monster? You're the monster now, Lawless of Greed. Nothing more than a sin." 

He turned and was faced with the vision of himself as he had been on the streets and he didn't even get the scream out before the sword stabbed into him and the shadows choked the rest of the life from his body. 

He woke up screaming, seeing the shadows all around him and coming _from_ him and he panicked, backing away and slamming into the wall, hands scrabbling at the wood as if he was going to dig himself free. 

"Lawless! Lawless!" He squirmed at the strong hands on his shoulders, until he was flipped around and he realized that the shadows were shoved to the side, his brother glaring at them until they dissipated into smoke and the room lost its oppressive feel and it didn't hurt to breathe. 

He stared up at worried red eyes and wanted to retreat, to go to the smaller—safer form of the hedgehog that he barely knew as his own, but he also wanted to just _run._ Away from the shadows and the spirits and the bad dreams. His world was supposed to be his, not haunted by the darkness. He needed to make it _his_. 

"You have to learn to control them," Sleepy Ash said, as if he was reading his mind. "That is the hardest part, but the demons will always be there, Lawless." His tone was gentle, but matter-of-fact. "It is something that is at the core of all of us…" he paused and slumped over slightly. "Even humans have them, just not quite so… powerful." His smile was bitter. 

Lawless shuddered and wrapped his arms around himself, trying to quell the burning in his chest. Everything hurt, but he wasn't hurt…. "I … " he swallowed and tried again, feeling a tear slip down his face. "I'm scared." 

"I know, Lawless—" Sleepy Ash's voice cracked a little and he wrapped his around his newest brother carefully. "It will be okay." 

Lawless nodded and rubbed at his eyes, a little ashamed to be caught crying, but he still felt like he was melting into the shadows, his body falling apart already. "You're sure we can't die?" he almost begged. He felt like he was dying now; like someone had stabbed him and he almost expected to feel the slick, almost gummy feel of blood on his hands as he clutched at his chest. His hands tangled into shadows instead and he nearly stopped breathing before he realized it was his scarf. 

"What on earth…" It was strange enough that he stopped being so frightened and he pulled it away gently, running his hands over the fabric. Sleepy Ash leaned forward too, the moment from earlier forgotten in lieu of Lawless' curiosity. "It feels like the shadows did in my dream, but…it's just fabric." _Cheap fabric at that…_ Nothing he had was worth much of anything, but… 

"You were wearing it when Father…" Sleepy Ash hesitated and seemed to search his face for something, before sighing. "When you were changed from being the nameless _human_ actor to Lawless." He tugged at the scarf and it wrapped around his hands of its own accord. "Everything about you was transmuted, down to the clothing you wore." His eyes fell on a patch on shirt. "And you were tagged like the rest of us, I see…" he murmured. 

"Huh?" Lawless hadn't noticed anything strange about his clothing before and he twisted around to see what Sleepy Ash was pointing at. He squinted at the letter on his shirt and made a face. "That wasn't there before…I don't think…" he felt a little confused. Why would someone put that on a shirt? 

"No, it wasn't there before," Sleepy Ash made a face. "It's … it's not something that will go away. You'll see it with the rest of us tomorrow, when we point it out." He traced the V with the tip of his finger. "Number five of however many Servamps that our father wants to create." He gave him a faint smile. "It'll follow you with your main clothing, over the years." 

"T-that's impossible," Lawless stuttered out. "Clothing just can't… we can't just…" 

"Ah, it's such a pain to explain it all…" Sleepy Ash made a face. "Look—we're monsters now," he said firmly, noticing the flinch that Lawless made, but going forward with his words. "Your old human rules don't apply to you anymore." He twisted Lawless' scarf with one hand. "This—does this look like the scarf you bought off the streets?" It was still twisted like a live thing and Sleepy Ash let go of it abruptly and the two of them watched it hang in the air. 

"I dreamt it was trying to kill me," Lawless swallowed. In his hands, it fell limp again, turning into fabric once more. "I mean….not the scarf, but someone had the scarf and…" he felt his cheeks burn with embarrassment. "It was only a dream, right?" 

Sleepy Ash's expression was unreadable as he looked him over, considering the words. "I can't say if it was or wasn't," he said finally, "but if it happened on your… stage—" he tilted  his head. "In your world, it was more real than a dream." He yawned again and leaned against Lawless, making himself comfortable. "Go to sleep. I'll make sure the shadows behave." 

"Even with you sleeping?" Lawless teased. He didn’t feel like sleeping, didn't want to close his eyes and see that darkness creeping up around him again. "I'll be fine, Sleepy Ash. I… I can stay up for awhile longer." 

Sleepy Ash sighed and changed into his cat form, curling into his lap. "Then you can watch me while I sleep and be comforted by that." There was no indication it was a tease in his voice, but Lawless grinned at the expression he wore. 

"Fine, fine—you're a cute little cat. I always thought you were and I don't even know why it isn't weird that now you're my brother, too," he murmured. "I guess it's a bit easier to understand now that I know what it's like to be a hedgehog…" 

"Something like that," Sleepy Ash stretched out and closed his eyes. "It will be alright, Lawless. You can overcome the shadows." 

~ 

It wasn't as bad the following night or the night after and he found himself slowly winning over the darkness in his dreams. It helped that he admitted he _was_ a monster; that was the hardest part of all, to slowly let go of his humanity bit by bit. It didn't meant that he stopped _caring_ , but to constantly fight the demon half of himself instead of accepting that it was still himself, was to let the shadows win. 

Sleepy Ash helped---his command of the shadows was so strong that Lawless was astonished at it; that was where _his_ main power lay. He was discovering that his own power was in the stage that he set for himself and by practicing, he could pull out pieces of that shadowy world inside of him for his stage and props while he told his stories. 

He was jerked out of his practicing, with Sleepy Ash making sure the shadows didn't riot and consume them all, when Wrath stomped in and glared at him, grabbing him by the scruff of the next and dragging him out of the room. "Ow, what—hey—what are you _doing_?" he demanded.

"You seem to be doing well enough that we can take you into town," she tugged at his clothing. "Or do you want to be wearing this for decades?" 

He stared down at himself and felt his skin flush all the way up to his ears. "I thought we couldn't change…" he muttered. Of course, if had known that he would have stayed in the same clothing for decades, he would have worn something differently, too. 

"Idiot," she muttered, but her expression was almost fond. "Come on—it's about to rain, so there are plenty of clouds out. I'm not about to bring my pet  hedgehog out to get clothing, so make sure you hold it together and avoid any sunlight that appears." 

He nodded slowly. He hadn't been outside in weeks, practicing and learning and trying to maintain a hold on himself and the bizarre changes that came with being a Servamp. He hadn’t gone through the town when he had first come here; it had been best to avoid it all together, in case something had gone wrong. 

"Come on then---" she pressed a hand against his back, subtly guiding him when he may have just stayed away. Would they be able to see he was a monster? Would he completely screw up and ruin it for all of them? He covered his mouth before the high-pitched squeak could emerge, but Wrath looked back, amusement in her eyes anyway. "Always a hedgehog," she laughed. "Lawless." 

He made a face but followed her out, noticing that it was just the two of them—no, wait—three of them—"You're coming, too?" He asked Envy, who had curled around his wrist in a mockery of a bracelet. 

"Someone has to help you buy clothes," the snake whispered. "A man—little sister can only do so much." He was content to be quiet after that and Lawless shook his head a little, but he was grateful for another's presence. He had expected Sleepy Ash's, but as he went out the door, he saw his brother being led away by their father and he suppressed the shiver of worry that crept down his spine. 

~ 

He was a little baffled at the way people spoke in the town and he glanced towards his sister, who was easily conversing with the same words. "He kept his mouth shut, knowing that he'd give himself away as being an idiot of some sort, not being able to understand. Had becoming a vampire made it impossible for him to understand common words? 

She noticed his look and she gave him a look of understanding as she led him down the pathway, where there weren't so many people. "You didn't notice you traveled to another country as you tried to find us?" she asked gently. He shook his head, shocked. "They speak a different language here and… well—" she gave a graceful shrug. "We've been around long enough that we pick the different languages up easily." 

He gave a slow nod; that made sense. If you were going to live a long time and had to move everywhere, it made sense that you tried to at least get the basics down… "I can't speak it," he said slowly. "I…" he made a face. "I don't even hardly understand them. It's almost familiar, but it's not… right." 

"You'll pick it up," she rested a hand on his shoulder. "You're a clever child, Lawless." She pushed him with only a little force towards the shop nearest them. "But first you're going to look like one and not the ragamuffin we found on the streets." 

He scowled, but couldn't deny her words. It was what he had been and what he still felt like; he was still finding his new place in the family. He was no longer the amusement, the adopted charity case, but something that felt more real, complete with the uncertainty and painful truths that they were letting him see. 

"I'll talk for you, or we can have Envy pretend to speak for you," she teased. "It's not a crime, Lawless. We all started somewhere." She stroked a hand over her arm in thought and his eye caught the IV stitched into her clothing and wondered if she had put it there herself or if like Sleepy Ash said, the number would follow, no matter what clothing was worn.

Lawless gave another nod and let her talk to the shop keeper, all of them involved in picking out something more fitting for the family, all of it suitable for his new life. He was grateful the shop didn't have any mirrors; he trusted the opinion of his sister and the whispered comments of his brother to pick what would work best and he found. 

He was still too twitchy in staying out too long and was grateful for when they headed home in his new clothing. He felt a coldness wrap around his neck for a moment, and found his scarf back around his neck, the ends draping down his back as he always wore it. He frowned a little; he hadn't put it on at all—was this one more thing that was going to follow him, like the number he could already see in the fabric of his new shirt?

When he questioned Wrath about it in the safety of their home, she simply shrugged. "You made it a part of your power," she said. "It followed you into your dreams, so of course it's going to tag along. You weren't fierce enough with it, but you can still make it work for you." She tugged on the scarf again , more gently this time. "It's a good look for you and it's good to have a mobile store of power, something that will never leave you." She patted his head. "Now come on, show the family what we found for you."

Lawless gave a hesitant nod; he hadn't considered such a thing. It was all too fantastical still, but the dreams flashed in his mind for a moment, of him reaching into the shadows and producing what he wanted and needed and his hesitance became less as he started to smile. He wouldn't have to be as scared of being weaker than anyone again. With this… he could do anything at all.

~

The dark half of him, waiting inside his mind, smiled as well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Still not through yet-- I have some great moments lined up here. :)


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